hi.hi.hi I’m here. I was at the MUSE concert last night so blogging took a backseat and I asked Billy Blanks to take the wheel. Kind of like how Carrie Underwood asks Jesus. So here we are with DAY 2 OF TOILET PICTURES AND CONTESTS FOR STARS AND RAINBOWS.
I realized that I should clarify what’s going on here for the new modg-ettes. So… everyone that reads this blog is a creep. They love to look at stuff on toilets. (i know…) So I devised a contest for readers to send in picture of their toilets with their shit all over it. Not literal shit. We’re not that creepy. Each day we’re voting for our favorite toilet and then we’ll have the toilet finals and THEN America’s favorite toilet. Dying?
In unrelated toilet news, I have a big MODG announcement tomorrow. MAKE SURE YOU READ TOMORROW’S POST IF YOU EVER WANT TO READ MODG AGAIN. Hoping that you do. Great. On with the toilets.
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
By, Raising Colorado
I know you are all fat prejudice, so I’m going to tell you that I know this toilet owner, and she is not fat. Let’s get that out there. K? Cool. But let’s not pretend, this is an EATERS toilet if I’ve ever saw one (and I have). Any good eater knows the basis of all eating is bacon. Duh everywhere. Throw in some Miller Lite for health reasons (the vegetable of beers), ice cream and slim fast for when you hate yourself late at night and you are a serious winner. Oh. and this ALL has an Asian Flare for BEING ASIAN 2010! (my goal). Also there is a small man guarding it all for security. I know I would too if bacon was on my toilet.
An Obvious Threat Indirectly to Me Toilet
This toilet person does not play. She’s all, Suri thinks she is running this baby show? I got news for her. She’s in for a world of pain when she sees this fashion fetus I’m brewing in my belly (THIS IS THE TOILET OWNER SPEAKING, NOT ME YOU BABY BUMP STALKERS). Just so you all know, I ran this by Suri. Suri was all, bitch please. Katie tried to give me a giraffe once, in Africa, in the jungle, because it was a REAL LIVE GIRAFFE. Oh Suri….However, I will say that as an adult baby, I would really like that sweater. It’s a good color for me.
(Possibly racist?) Snob Dog on a Toilet
This toilet says so much while saying so little. You know this dog is one snobby ass white bitch. It’s all, color? Color is for children who live in a trailer park and play with crayola and the like. WHITE WHITE WHITE. I holiday in the hamptons, where I attended Diddy’s white party and sipped chardonnay with Diane Keaton. It was a dry heat that year. White is where it.is.at. WHITE POWER. (just kidding…maybe)
*UPDATE you bitches, her tiles are brown. Like the color brown, not dirty. She is not spreading shit around on her floor. She is a nice person who cleans. Moving on.
LOOK AT ME CAT I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF THIS SHIT
So those dinosaurs are all, look at me! I’m famous! I’m on the internet! I have candy and a strange fame! HOORAY FOR DINOSAURS. But much to their surprise a monster cat hovers above them ready to take their shit OUT. The cat is all, this is not your show, I live here and I have sparkle hats and ears and if you think you are ruining my one chance for internet fame, you have another think coming in your broke ass extinct brains. *The green tape worm concerns me* Bets are on the cat.
A baby with a toilet fetish
I don’t know a lot about babies, but I don’t think this one is ready to balance itself 3 feet up on a toilet. But I really do enjoy the 3 fingers there, on the edge, ready to go. Maybe the baby is a girl scout? That’s their thing right? But I will say this baby LOVES THE TOILET. Much like her idol, MODG. So point for stuff in common. But this baby is throwing it in our faces that she is spoiled. Paris Hilton did this once on 20/20 and the public was not pleased. Maybe she should have checked with her PR people first? Regardless, I like this spoiled diamond baby. I think we’ll be friends.
*****
Ok America. You have 5 awesome toilets to choose from this week. Voting will end 12pm tomorrow eastern. Remember, the winner after the finals gets a toilet badge! I mean, come on….that’s best ever.
Vote in the comments for your toilet heart. And remember to come back for the monster MODG announcement tomorrow.
sparkle pisser,
MODG
The internet psychic says you would like this too:
- Day 1 of AMERICA’S FAVORITE STUFF ON TOILETS.
- OTHER people’s stuff on OTHER people’s toilets???? Oh yes.
- You want toilets? You want weird shit? FINE. YOU GOT IT.
- Single discussing his favorite subject: Cats. Ok not cats. It’s sex.
Tagged as: toilet
POSTED IN: Drunk Stuff,Stuff on a toilet
Hi I’m MODG. But you can call me MODG. You say it like Modg, like a Grandma name. Not like M.O.D.G. That’s a lot of syllables and I don’t have that kind of time. 
{ 104 comments… read them below or add one }
This is fierce competition, FIERCE.
And you nailed it. I eat a bunch of unhealthy shizz for like four days and then do the Miller Lite/Slim Fast diet for three.
With soy sauce.
Again, I have to throw it down for all us DOG lovers! And yes, racist dogs are included. I am excused from racism because my dog is a totes brown choco lab. I know your jealous Mr White dog, but don't worry I still voted for you.
I was thinking on throwing in a Toilet pic btu I'm throwing in the towel…can't compete!
and MUSE!?!?! I'm going on April 9th and love oh so dearly…you just reached a new level of cool =)
I vote toilet 1 cuz hey, I love food.
Oh, it's a toss up..either Suburban HIT's toilet, or the baby on the toilet. Tough call.
The baby and white dog are definitely giving me a run for my money, but Suri better watch her back…Baby H.I.T. is coming to town. And not in a Santa Baby kinda way. She's throwing down the gauntlet, extinguishing Suri's torch, and kicking her off the damn island.
p.s. Did you hear they think Katie is trying to have another Suri? She's back into all the scientology stuff that she did last time she wanted to get preggers. Just saying, maybe she feels the competition…bring it on.
EXCELLENT captioning, MODG, excellent. Funny thing is, my bathroom is bright purple and has art on the wall above the subway tiles!
As for my little white bitch, she's also slutty. For Halloween, she wore a sparkly red dress and partied as herself: an attention whore.
I love the dog!!!
I am going to throw my vote on the first one. Because food + ice cream + toys = awesome.
Is anyone else gagging a bit from the looks of the floor in the dog one?? I've seen gas stations at waysides with cleaner floors.
Toilet number four totally has my vote. For shiz.
I vote for LOOK AT ME CAT I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF THIS SHIT. Because everyone knows cats are a WAY better accessory than dogs. Duh.
As soon as I saw a crock-pot on a toilet, I knew it was Z-Dub.
I'm throwing a vote to “LOOK AT ME CAT I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF THIS SHIT”. Anyone that can get their cat to pose on a toilet deserves my vote.
Oh and without a doubt that dog is racist…AGAINST ASIANS.
The one with the cat because cats trump everything always.
Awe, I'm going to have to vote for my friend Courtney's “Spoiled” baby!
I'm going for the cat. I really like ZDub and the dog one (the baby- not so much) but the cat has it just because its a tuxedo cat.
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet fo sho.
Whitey's owner is azn.
I vote for the cat toilet!! I love how the cat just threw a pose there and is happy to do it.
I have a toilet pic. too late to submit???
I'm voting for the “Look at me” cat. Obv the cat uses that space as a hidey spot & is above the nonsense of posing. Plus, CATS RULE. Js.
I'm going with the first one. I'm hungry.
Clearly, the racist dog !
Dogs trump babies and cats. And asians (food)
I'm voting for Spoiled Diamond Baby. Babies have to stick together.
The one with the smurf on it. Cuz I love smurfs.
Definitely definitely voting for Baby With a Toilet Fetish. How freaking cute is that kid?! Love it!
ZDub FTW! You can't compete with crockpot, beer and bacon.
Hands down: Look at me cat. Partly because I think thee's tabasco in the background and partly bc thats what my room looks like…minus the toilet.
ummmm…did i read too much into toilet #2 or did it specifically say that YOU have a baby brewing in your belly???????????????
I'm am so for the bacon. Count me in!
the cat picture.. but only because of the dinosaurs!
Gotta go for Suburban HIT's commode. Seriously. Even though I'm quite the foodie and love bacon down to it's little bits (the real ones, at least) there's just something wrong about food on a toilet. And not good wrong, either. Germ wrong. *shudder*
Who can really say no to beer, ice cream, and bacon? Not me. Food toilet fo' sho'.
My vote is for the first one. Why you ask? B/c I <3 EVERYTHING on that toilet…except maybe the slim fast (maybe I should <3 it a little more?? Whatevs). Bacon….LOVE it. Crockpot….it's my cooking savior. Beer….can't go wrong there. Soy sauce…dig it. Toy Story references…..major kudos!! Burts Bees chapstick….my fave. Ice cream….major <3s. Those Thai boxed noodles/meals…..yep…dig those too.
Um my vote is for the baby! Who the hell could turn down a face like that?!?!?! That poster, is Evil with a capital E. Babies always won. ALWAYS.
Son's too busy watching J&K+8 dvd's to vote today. sors.
Wow–the comp is heating up-I have to go with baby with a toliet fetish because it is just a perfect toliet picture!
drunk & fat for sure. every g.d. time.
my vote is for LOOK AT ME CAT I AM BETTER THAN ALL OF THIS SHIT
I like animals on toilets.
Again, voting for the one with the cat. I love how cats always try to squeeze themselves into impossibly small places. But I also love the sparkly ears headband. I want it!
1
My dog is red. And whether that makes him a redneck and besties with Jeff Foxworthy or a Native American who can get me shares of one of those lucrative Native American casinos, I gotta vote for Snob Dog on a Toilet!
I like toilet 1
Yea! My babies on a toilet! I vote for my baby! And thanks to everyone else who did and thinks she's cute! <3
I am for the Inga Dog. Perfect.
Bacon Toilet gets my enthusiastic vote. Not only are all of my favorite foods on that toilet – but lady has thought ahead to when you wake up from the food / beer coma with chapped lips, and has given me my fav. lip product ever: burts. Lovesit.
Thank you Raising Colorado for inspiring my dinner for the night, and reminding me about Smurfs. Solid.
Totally voting for the Bacon / Food / Woody toilet.
Woody. Toilet. Um, wrong. But yes, I vote for her.
I vote for the CAT because any cat that likes tequila, tabasco, and dinosaurs is a winner in my book.
Close second is the racist dog since I have a racist black lab (seriously, it's embarrassing who he barks at). But cats always trump dogs- just ask the bitch cat who runs my house.
The soy sauce/Miller Lite Toilet has my vote! Nothing like having a woody on the toilet when you're smurfing!
For some reason, the creepy cat one is really sticking out at me. He all, “I hate glitter but I want to be in the toilet picture”.
I like the dog toilet mostly because I have a white dog, only mines 6x's that size. But the floor is dirty and makes me want to vommit all over that little dog.
So I vote for Skinny/Fat Asian toilet.
Also, you are a beotch for getting to go to MUSE. I hate you (but really still love you.). GRRRRR!!!!
Toilet Dog. That might have to be my new band name.
I vote:
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
It makes SO much sense on SO many levels.
I vote for: Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
Clearly, Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
toliet girlscout baby, totally!
I'm going with #1 because I'm down with Asians (even if they aren't down with me).
The first one, of course. ZDub is the best….
Obvs Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet. ZDub = <3
I'm for Raising Colorado.
I <3 ZDub!
I vote for the baby. that was really hard for me because I'm all about bacon (& I'm a fatty) but I'm a gigantic fan of babies. babies make the world go 'round. kinda like bacon.
big competition today! wow.
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
I vote for the Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet. The smurf is what sold me!
Mmmm bacon.
ZDub! ZDub! ZDub!
I'm voting baby. Cuz they shed less than dogs. The End.
Toilet Dog. I'd see a band called that. And the floor doesn't look dirty, it looks like brown floor tile and bad lighting.
Toilet dog get my vote. Everything about that photo is WHITE until you look at the floor…holy shit! Get a swiffer wetjet for that nastiness!! SICK!
ZDub!
Colorado Crock-pot all the way, baby.
Food toilet. Just because I thiiink there is burts bees chapstick on the toilet. which is random and amazing.
GOOD GOD PEOPLE, MY TILES ARE BROWN!
Granted, I chose brown so it would camouflage when I someday have kids running around, backyard, bathroom, garden, bathroom, and also because it looks pretty with the purple paint in the rest of the room–but FOR REALS. I AM A SERIAL CLEANER AND YOU ARE MAKING ME CRY I HATE YOU AND AM NEVER COMING BACK BC YOUR BITCHINESS ISN'T FUNNY.
Vote for me.
i vote drunk and fat skinny asian toilet, bc i can just picture myself trying so many times to get the soy sauce to stay so well-balanced on the lip of the crock pot. that takes skill and patience.
I vote for
An Obvious Threat Indirectly to Me Toilet
Definitely going with Suburban HIT's toilet. It's about time someone took on Suri!
the one with the crock pot. period.
Bacon is good, white dogs and white babies are cute too, BUTTttt the monster tuxedo cat, carnivores and chocolate candies are the image of a toilet picture perfect.
-Love, the owner of the “look at me cat i am better than all of this shit”!
This is supremely awesome, but I can't help wonder how many pics you get of random naked guys atop the throne, their purple-headed avenger on full display.
Yum, bacon.
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet
Suburban HIT is absolutely my pick – love her Suri challenge.
gotta give it to the food. asian, chubby hubby, bacon and woody? done!
I'm voting for Suburban HIT's baby toilet all the way. Someone needs to put that Suri Cruise in her place!!
Baby + Your Belly= WHAT??
PS. I vote for the cat sparkle ears & hat.. Who doesn't love glitter??
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian toilet, hands down.
I wanna cook up some rice and slather it in pad thai sauce now. Thanks.
Snob dog! Snob dog!
Asians rule. ZDub should win best potty. And prom queen.
i vote for dog on a toilet. because if you could REALLY get a dog on a toilet, dogs would be even better than they already are.
BAHAHAH!! OMG! Your whole commentary cracks me the hell up, but especially this: “But I really do enjoy the 3 fingers there, on the edge, ready to go. Maybe the baby is a girl scout?”
My vote is for the racist white dog
Delurking to vote for #2 and also, fashion fetus = sparkle girl?
My vote is for the Suri Cruise toilet just because you ran it by her and she said “Bitch please”.
Girl you so crazy !! LOVE IT !Bacon has my vote
Bacon toilet wins this round. Hands down.
I've got to say. that round bored me. But who am i to talk? i didnt send in a pic.
i vote baby.
I generally can't resist a cute dog, but cats are unruly and can't be told what to do. So how Chapter Twenty got her cat to sneak into that little space with dinosaurs on the prowl is beyond me and gets my vote!
Drunk, fat and skinny Asian toilet. ZDub. Absolutely.
I wanna vote for the cat picture because I'm a tuxedo cat owner, but my cat mostly hates me so I'm for the food pic. because food doesn't hate me
Food on a toilet is always a total win. Sparkle hats is a close second.
I love these creepy people and I'm so excited to see my creepy toilet pic!
drunk and fat asian toilets rule!
Zdub wins. She has a Smurf on her toilet. Enough said.
Snob dog please! She is so hot.
My vote goes to
Drunk and Fat Skinny Asian Toilet!!
I love me some ZDUB!
I will have to vote for toilet 1! I love crockpot cooking, and with bacon, it doesn't get much better. Except for the B&J for dessert. Yeah, thats the best part!
I vote cat toilet cuz cats are always trying to get up in your chiz no matter what you are doing. Cat toilet all the way.
I have to vote for the cat again…I cant get enough toilet+cat pics
Again, I think your comments have made my choice for me
But, sometimes less IS more.
My vote is for:
Snob Dog on a Toilet