Many of you long time MODG-ers remember Single Guy. Single Guy is a lovable asshole who wrote for us every Tuesday. Here, he shared tales of his creepy dating life. We learned that girls with cats are bad and girls with good underwear are good. We also learned that you better know how to eat edamame correctly or you are OUT. SG has since moved on to nothing, but he’s back to check in. And since he tends to ramble, I’ve put this in interview format so he could only do so much damage. I apologize in advance for his grammar. Please welcome back SINGLE GUY!
Hi SG. We miss you. Sometimes.
Here are some questions for you:
1) What have you been up to since MODG?
While it pains me to say this, not much is new in my life since my last post to MODG. I have been traveling like crazy for work and living the dream. I did attend a bachelor party in Montreal, Quebec where I saw some pretty “interesting” (gotta love SG’s use of quotes) stuff. Otherwise, my life is very much the same but I still keep up with the happenings of MODG, definitely like the new lay out. Is it weird that I like poka dots? (Yes, because it’s polka. And gay.)
2) Any serious ladies in your life? If not any ho shout outs?
I am going to plead the fifth on this one in fear of any potential DTR (DTR? Death Trap Rape?) conversations but I am certainly happy with my current situation. One thing that you may find amusing is that my Mom works in a Gyno (Mom and Gyno are capitalized. I missed you SG) office and tried to hook me up with a Pharmaceutical Sales Rep, um AWKWARD. Oh and this is the second time, the first time she tried to hook me up with a patient! This is certainly not a bust on my Mom because I would never speak poorly of my Mom she is a wonderful woman and just wants her son to be happy, although she may be forcing the subject. However, if she is good enough for Momma she is good enough for me because like they always say, Momma knows best (Somehow I doubt your momma is checking their underwear status).
I got hos. In different area codes area codes...
3) Do you miss us?
More than life itself. Of course I miss my days on MODG, for many reasons. I am no longer knocked off my high horse on a regular basis. I no longer get tooled on by random Blog (Do you just capitalize things that seem important to you?) readers that I have never met nor even spoken to. Long range shit talking was something I had to get used to. Also, with all these flights I have taken this year (43 to date) I do not have my weekly posts to pass time away.
4) Do you like cats any better these days?
Still hate cats, although I appreciate your cat posts. I hate cats and they hate me, but I am okay with that.
5) Who is your favorite blogger and why? This answer is obvious.
MODG of course, mostly because on planes I do not have Internet access and it is tough for me to find time to read Blogs when I am busy roaming the country. (Um, this sounds like the worst reason for me to be your favorite ever)
6) Would you or have you ever been on a date with a MODG reader? Be honest.
Of course I would, everyone deserves a chance. I would likely first ask for pictures or maybe a Facebook profile because I am shallow and I realize that. Also, dates in DC are expensive and my time in DC is even more limited. So if I am going on a date with a girl from MODG or someone I met along the way I am going to make sure it is worth it. Oh and I never went on a date with an MODG reader but I did go on a few dates with an MODG’s reader sister. (!!!) The dates went pretty well but then it fizzled out. I knew this secret but just wanted him to tell all of you so you could die a little.
7) When are you getting married?
WOW, tough question. Let me be cliche here: When I find the love of my life. (But that’s yourself SG?) My search for that individual remains underway. I am certainly pulling up the caboose though (I don’t know what that means. I think it’s sexual.)
8 Anything new you’ve learned about women in the past few months?
I think I have learned a lot since my last posts, one thing in particular is that I REALLY do not enjoy girls that say “like” a lot so try to limit your “likes” and along the same topic you should also limit your acronyms, respect the english language (I’m SURE you don’t mean MODG). They both make you sound REALLY stupid.
Guest reader question:
If you could be any fruit, what would you be and why?
Hmm, you would probably expect me to say a banana (for obvious reasons) (You like potassium? Or you’re gay?) but I HATE bananas, they are gross and on my very short list of foods I hate. So I would have to say an orange because while I may have a hard exterior that you should stay away from, once you peel back the skin you get to the soft and sweet insides. [and I fully intend to get tooled on for this one] (BAHAHAHAHAHAA, I’m relying on the readers to take that one and run with it)
That’s all.
We heart you.
I heart you too.
POSTED IN: Drunk Stuff,Single Guy
Hi I’m MODG. But you can call me MODG. You say it like Modg, like a Grandma name. Not like M.O.D.G. That’s a lot of syllables and I don’t have that kind of time. 
