No matter how hippie I get my boobs do not need to be out during labor. They just don't.
Last night I told B that it was date night and that I rented a movie for us. The movie was The Business of Being Born. Yes, that documentary with Ricki Lake and other large nippled women giving birth on the flo’. And let me tell you, going in I was not really biased. I watched this because I was really confused. We grow up and picture Aunt Becky giving birth to twins in the hospital and Uncle Jesse is coaching her while the doctor pulls out the baby (prepare yourself for so many Aunt Becky references in the next few months), which is what I always knew and pictured for myself. I mean midwives and shit are for hippies who don’t shave and live on communes and have long dirty braids and are usually practicing Wiccans. I like Jcrew and 20 dollar soaps and Bravo TV and also really alot of Britney Spears. So why was I thinking about this direction? Simple. I don’t like people deciding things for me. So if I have a choice about my ice cream flavor or my vagina happenings, I want to make that choice for myself.
Now I’m not dumb. I know this documentary was slanted in one direction. However it was eye opening. For those of you unaware, this film explores the inadequacies of US hospitals in terms of maternity care. Or as I like to call it, a lot of scary ass shit. So you all know that a few months back I started seeing a midwife really because I had just had bad experiences with white coat doctors before. But I started to have doubts about this natural thing and be scared that 1) I couldn’t do it or 2) it was too dangerous. I now really think that I most definitely CAN do it and that it’s just as safe if not safer than doing it in a hospital. Mind blowing.
I’m not going to go into all of the details and points that the film made. But what did scare me was how often doctor’s give pitocin to induce contractions. And any contractions that are like not by nature are PAINFUL. Then you’re in so much goddamn pain that you need an epidural. Then you need more pitocin because your contractions slowed down. Then you need another epidural because that one wore out. Then the baby is like, SERIOUSLY? And then it can go into distress and bam, you are in for a c-section.
Some people want C-Sections. Here’s the thing. I scar. Bad. And there’s a whole bit with the bonding of the baby as soon as it’s born. I’m already concerned that this child will hate me so I think I need that. Also I’m really not interested in recovering from surgery. I’m busy.
And did you know that giving birth while laying on your back is like the worst idea since Jennifer Love Hewitt? Apparently we do it so it’s easier for the doctor to get your vag hole at eye level. Meanwhile gravity is pushing the baby into your spine and not out the exit hole. I want everything in creation pointing that baby to the exit hole, including flashing signs and “Closing Time” on repeat.
Obviously all of this badness doesn’t happen to everyone. But I can tell you that it’s definitely not happening to me. I have a general distrust for doctors already due to my own personal experiences and I’m just not down for the conveyor belt of preggos, pumping out babies like a tootsie roll factory. No offense tootsie roll makers. But a lot of this stuff is for the benefit of the doctor, the hospital and the insurance companies to get you in and out as fast as possible. Not the benefit of me. AND ME RULES.
YES I know I know I know that I’m in for a world of pain and I know it’s going to be hard. But I believe that for one day in my life, I can do it. I have decided to work with the Birth Center of the hospital which is connected to the hospital itself. So if something does go wrong, bam, hospital time, like within 15 seconds. I just don’t want any unnecessary intervention. If I can do it, I’m going to do it.
Again, what I want to stress to everyone is only that you have options. I never would have known that I didn’t HAVE to go to a hospital and do things the traditional way if people didn’t tell me (hearts to Zdub). I don’t like stupid companies and manly doctor men taking advantage of my women people. So take care of yourself women people and just know your choices. Spit on them if you want, but know them. Remember, women are fancy these days with the vote and tampons. Use your fancy and your smarts.
I can't see why the hippies would object to this.
I have 8 months left of exploring (4 months now!). Who knows what shit I’ll come up with by then.
<——–Maybe a birthing costume.
The internet psychic says you would like this too:
Hi I’m MODG. But you can call me MODG. You say it like Modg, like a Grandma name. Not like M.O.D.G. That’s a lot of syllables and I don’t have that kind of time. 
{ 58 comments… read them below or add one }
Kudos to you for taking such an active stance and knowing your options! I’ve heard horror stories about the pitocin/epidural circle. You can do it!!!
I think it’s awesome that you chose natural birth!
I went to a midwife hospital first as well. It’s a hospital only for women. They only have midwives, but they all have their master’s degree and are also certified to give epidurals if needed. The hospital also has a doctor on standby just in case…but I felt better and safer with doctors. I think it’s great that we have choices.
In the end I was happy about my decision because Emma was born not breathing, and they whisked her away quickly.
The contraction pains are horrible, but they only last for a while. I gave birth without the effects of the epidural and it hurt horribly, but I am glad. It’s a great experience, believe it or not! I had to be induced because I was running of that fluid and baby could not be in there anymore with that little fluid. I had to have Pitocin for contractions and then another medicine so my cervix would soften. Not fun at all. Took the epidural but it stopped working right before I was fully dilated.
Also, I was on my side when I gave birth, and my bed was inclined downward.
I truly believe that after you give birth to your baby naturally, you will feel like you can do almost anything! In the end, it’s whatever you feel more comfortable with. Giving birth is an amazing experience, and you should be able to do it however you are most comfortable with.
I was induced with pitocin and had an epidural in the hospital. I had a wonderful experience and wouldn’t change a thing. I hope all this goes as you want it to but nothing can be “planned” when it comes to having a baby. I totally get where you are coming from though since you have had bad experiences. Love you and your blog!
girl, sparkle power to you. if you are willing to shoot the spawn (i mean that affectionately…all babies look like aliens when they come out) out naturally then go for it! women back in the day gave birth without any drugs or doctors… they had shamans and crazy voodoo witch doctors rolling around helping the baby come out. now i understand your midwife experience will be MUCH different than that (for the sake of baby P, i hope so), but cheers to you being a strong informed woman who is making the choice to do it old school. we’re waiting with bated breath to hear how it goes.
I suggest multiple birthing costume changes ala Britney. So many possibilities for a whole birthing wadrobe…
this is literally the best idea ever
I watched The Business of Being Born a few years ago. It was def. eye opening. It made me want to get knocked up again just so I could experience a natural child birth. Although, I’d probably sissy out & beg for the drugs. Which for me would be good b/c I’m one of hte few women they SPEED up labor instead of slowing it down. It’s sped up so much that they epidurals don’t even work. So, I got stuck with a big ass needle AND felt every push. Fun times.
I doubt you read CJANE, but if you get a chance you might want to read what she wrote about the birth of her daughter. It was natural & at home. She said it was the most painful, but rewarding experiences in her life. That just when she thought she couldn’t do it anymore, she was meeting her baby.
I have 2 daughters and if I knew then what I know now about childbirth I would definitely go the natural route and with a midwife! I had 2 different doctors and I love my second one, but I would never want to be induced again and go through the epidural! Good for you!
Seriously, where would the sparkle queen be without her sparkle bra for birth!!! DO IT!
I just snarfed my breakfast shake when I read the bit about playing Closing Time on repeat, it’s the perfect song to get that baby out and into the world!!! The baby has to think of it this way – he/she doesn’t have to go home, they just can’t stay in Club Uterus – they need to think of birth and their first meal as Denny’s after the big 9 Month Party in your belly! ox
Your description of the hospital experience is EXACTLY what happen to me, my water broke at night, I took a shower, let my husband finish watching the Hockey game cuz I’m nice like that and off we went to the hospital. The minute they got me in a bed I was given Pitocin but they didn’t tell me they had given it to me until after the fact and my cute little birth plan that I had spent hours working on, that explicitly said no drugs unless absolutely necessary, was out the window.
For the next 9 hours I was in excruciating pain – my contractions were a minute apart and were lasting 4 minutes. I was finally like F-it give me the epidural because I wasn’t even dilated to 4 cm yet. Then an hour later they gave me MORE Pitocin and an hour after that the baby was in so much distress they have to give me an emergency c-section. My son had to go to the NICU for 5 days because he was Tachypnic which is common with c-section babies.
Then a few weeks of trying every day to breast feed and using the pump ever 2 hours I finally gave up, another side effect of c-sections, my milk never came.
It’s been a year now and my son is the most perfect baby ever but it was super stressful and given the chance to do it again I would go the same route your going. I know this isn’t what happens to everyone who goes to the hospital and a lot of people have great experiences but I would never want anyone to go through what I went through. It left me with a real sense of helplessness. On a brighter note though the epidural was fabulocity and I wanted to take one home with me but they said no.
Not gonna lie, anything birthing-baby related makes me want to vom, even though I know I want to have kids. I love how you stuck to your gut feelings and are going with what is right for you. My bf just finished his ob/gyn rotation (please don’t hate me because he wants to be a doctor) and he would come home and tell me about some of the women who were screaming, yelling, crying…I told him to be ready because that WILL be me. And I don’t take blood, yucky stuff…basically anything that comes out of my body well (queezy). So I’m a wuss. But I’m def. going to explore this option when the time comes. There is a midwife that actually lives 3 doors down from us…fate, perhaps?
YIKES…. that whole birth thing is (the major) reason I adopted BY CHOICE (1st and only!!). I seriously can’t imagine being in the position of a head commin’ outta me and there’s no turning back!! Scary, scary, scary and at 41, I still can fit into my prom dress from 1987! Yep- same butt and boobs from the 80′s- adoption is GREAT for your body!! But, I’m sure you’ll be fine….
I just watched that the other day… AFTER giving birth naturally. I really wanted to go natural this time around, LOVE my doctor so I wanted to stick with her but was super nervous. Funny thing is, watching that movie put my thoughts into words better than I could. Don’t get me wrong, going natural was the most difficult thing I’ve EVER done (and I’ve done some physically TOUGH things) and the BEST thing ever. It’s all sucky until the pushing and the feeling after is incredible. My son was with epi and her without. I loved my son after I had him but the love I felt for her after blew the love I felt for him out of the water. I didn’t LOVE her more, it just was the natural hormones doing the thing they were suppose to do. Well, it’s all on my birth story and I link to one of my favorite home birth stories. So, if you want some vagina reading and want to know WAY too much info about my private parts…
http://whatwasisayingagain1018.blogspot.com/2010/06/charlotte-birth-story.html
Choices are good! and you ARE definetly VIP- so do what is right for you! YOU CAN DO IT!
I did get induced at 41 weeks (that’s a long time to go with a whole baby in the belly) I did the whole induction/ pitocin/ epidural thing- and my experience was actually really great.
I seriously just got a little bit of coffee in the ol’ nose reading this- I saw this Ricky Lake horror film- but it’s waaaaay more fun reading your explanation of it! Loved it!
I don’t plan on ever having children, so I don’t have a strong opinion either way, but look at it this way: those chicks on “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant” have their toilet babies without drugs all the time, and they lived through it. If a 16 year old can have a baby in the bathroom of a McDonalds, I think you can handle this natural stuff.
MODG, what you described above is EXACTLY what happened to me. And the worst part is that I let it happen. I had wanted to deliver naturally but let the doctor and my husband talk me into inducing for STUPID fucking reasons. It was terrible from the first moment to the last. Boops is almost 2 now and I’m still having medical issues from the surgery. And the worst part, if I ever have another baby (which I want) I will have to have a cesarean again. I’m trying to find a doctor who will do a VBAC, But not many will. And very few insurance companies will cover it.
When I was induced I asked the nurse to start the drip slow so I could ease into labor and handle it, like you naturally do. And I was doing fine with it. But after about 2 hours my doctor broke my water “to get things going”. In the end I labored for 13 hours (never got an epidural) and dilated to a 7 but my daughter never dropped (even after my water was broken). Finally my doctor came in and said they needed to do a cesarean. I sobbed and sobbed. And as soon as they turned off the pitocin my labor stopped. My body was NEVER in labor. It was completely false, which is probably why I could handle it without an epidural. I got up and wrapped my gown around me and WALKED back to the OR.
I obviously still have a lot of issues around it. I had severe post partum depression. No one really understands what this does to you unless you’ve been there. Your husband can’t really understand. Giving birth and mothering is basically the NUMBER 1 thing we are designed to do. When something interfers with that, its very hard to forget about it or not be upset about it. Of course, I’m in absolute love with my daughter and can’t imagine life without her. But from the day of her birth and for about a year and a half after, I was in a really bad place. I’m just now starting to feel like myself again.
I just want anyone who reads this to understand how much this can affect you. I am all for doing what works for you. But I don’t think enough women truly educate themselves on their own bodies and its capabilities. Thanks MODG for not being a dumbass.
This is almost my story exactly except my water DID break on its own when I was 5 days overdue but my contractions “weren’t strong enough” so I was given pitocin. After being maxed out on the dosage for 12 hours (and going without an epi for that time) I asked for the epidural and the doctor came into the room and was all “It’s been 24 hours since your water broke so we need to do a c-section.” Uh…WTF is this? A turkey? The timer was “up” apparently so into the OR I went. Because I didn’t KNOW I could refuse. I didn’t KNOW I could say “Uh…negative Ghostrider. I’ll take a few more hours to see what happens.”
So, like Boops here says, “Thanks MODG for not being a dumbass” and thanks for helping other people not be dumbasses, too.
This is one of the funniest post I have ever read. i laughed out loud in front of a lot of people during a lecture (who all stared at me and i tried to convince them i was coughing) but so worth it! Can’t wait for this actual process to be described in 4 months!
I was induced 1 week after my due date. I had mid-wives in a regular hospital. I got to walk around and take showers and stuff. Most hospitals strap your ass down from the minute you check yourself in. The pitocin definitely jacked up my contractions but my Archie came out in about 6 pushes.
I think you made a great choice!
Thanks everyone for sharing your stories. It just makes me feel even better about the decision I’m making. You’d be amazed at how many people straight up laugh in your face when you say you want to go in this direction. I’m already going to be in enough pain the laughing is excessive.
There is not a lot I look back on and regret, but I wish I had done what you are doing for child birth. On my first I just didn’t know and then for the second I was so busy raising the first that I just went along with the regular motions. Even my hippie friends went to regular OB/Gyn’s so I just didn’t think about it. After the horrid experience of my second birth, everything that you said makes perfect sense and if I’d have just (been patient and not forced them to admit me and take the baby the hell out) listened to my body then I would have gone all natural. I ended up having completely failed epidurals both times so I would have had a much more natural and less painful birth if I had gone natural. I’ve made up for it by going natural now that the kids are out, but oh, what I wish I had known then! Even on those TLC shows, they make it look like the hippie moms are nut farmers rather than highly informed people who know what they are doing.
Good luck! I had all sorts of plans like that, but ended up with a c-sec. No choice. Baby was breech (in a ball, with her feet on her head, and not budging!). Just a couple of things to note from my experience … damn stretch marks scar more than a c-sec incision. And, I LOVED my doula! I’m not really into natural-type stuff, but she was fantastic. Also, if you’re interested, I can tell you more about the disgusting side effects of pain killers that landed me back in the ER 10 days after giving birth. Bleh.
Good for you for being proactive. I’ll keep my fingers crossed that you baby lets you make your own decisions!
Oh, AND, if you give birth in a hospital, most of them MAKE you wear their heinous garb so no sparkle bras for you! But no matter, pushing a human out of your chucky empowers you in a way that nothing else does. You will want to do it again just to prove you can do it better each time.
BUT you can buy a hospital gown in a pretty color/print (I’m thinking pink and green, obvi) that most hospitals will let you wear. Tori Spelling did and really who doesn’t want to be like her?
Oh, and how uncomfortable to be all titties hanging out all over the place. I’m sorry, this is maybe TMI but I had so much stuff gushing out of me that I was glad to be somewhat covered up with the gown. Whatever is comfortable, I guess.
I’m feeling very sisterly right now! this is exactly why I love this blog, I’m not ready for babies JUST yet, but I am 25 and I’ve been married a year, so yeah its possible. But, at this point I would not freely go around looking up info on birthing practices, etc. But MODG has made all this important stuff hysterical and cool. I like that we can mix sparkle bras with giving birth. I like all this information and stories because sooner than later this will all matter to me. I would have never thought about natural childbirth but I really appreciate all this information, because this is all real shit that you can’t just get anywhere. In the words of Big Boops, Modg, thanks for not being a dumbass.
I tried for a natural home birth for my second baby, I also had bad experiences with doctors and hospitals. My 1st baby was a C, and I had a majorly traumatic experience on the table. So my second was a home VBAC. 34 hours of mind blowing pain, until I finally said F this take me to the hospital. But because I was a VBAC, they wouldnt just give me an epidural so I could keep trying. They sliced and diced me. But at that point I was so relieved that the pain was going end that I didn’t care anymore how the baby got here. Plus I felt like something was wrong, I mean she wasn’t budging one iota! Anyway, turned out she was 9lb 2oz. I am only 5′ tall. And she was malpositioned (head facing forward)… so I think I did the right thing in going to the hospital because according to the midwife even tho the baby was still fine and going strong, she admitted it would be maaaaany maaaany more hours of labor ahead of us. BUT – If someone had told me it was only one more hour of pushing then I would have stuck it out. Its just that there was no end in sight and I was done.
I think mine is the exception though. I know lots of moms who successfully home birthed, some even without a midwife! just their husband and their kids! Thats kinda crazy but its their choice! You can do this. It is AWESOME that you have a birthing center!! Does this mean you at least have the option of an epidural? I think an epidural can actually be a key to successful birth. If I had had one, I could have pushed for hours and hours more! I only WISH I had a birthing center in Las Vegas!
I applaud your choice! Everyone who says you shouldn’t do it can go suck it. What do they know!
Please dont infer that c-section automatically = shitty birth and no bonding with your baby.
Thats just bullshit Modg.
I was waiting for this….
Bri, I said this stuff doesn’t happen to everyone, very clearly.
some c sections are great some are not. But given the choice I don’t want one. I very well may have to have one. And if I do, I have to deal with it. But I don’t support elective c-sections for convenience.
Go ahead and plan, plan, plan as much as you think you can!
But I can tell you from an experienced Mommy of two (one natural and one not) when the shit hits the fan, it really hits the fan. A birth plan is the farthest thing from your mind and all you want to do is get that mother out! Good Luck! I’m giggling.. I love reading all the first time moms stuff!
If the plan hits the fan so be it, but at least I tried and knew my options. And I least shared those choices with others.
I’m not an idiot, I know things don’t happen always the way you want them to. But all I can do is try.
i love that you said you wanted to hear other people’s stories because i wanted to share mine but didn’t want to scare anyone
i planned on going natural (my husband thought i was crazy) with our first, but as luck turns out i know how to get babies in but can’t figure out how to get them out! i have an amazing doctor and wouldn’t consider using anyone else and after what happened i’m so thankful for him. with my oldest, i went 2 weeks overdue before they induced (i had heard that pitocin was the devil and i really wanted to try natural) i went into labor the day before i was supposed to be induced but my contractions never got regular so in total i was in labor for about 40 hours. cameron was faced the wrong way so i didn’t have regular labor. i got to have back labor and we learned that i have to have a rediculous amount of pain medication for an epidural to work. when cameron was finally born (20 mins from having to have an emergency c-section) the cord was wrapped around his neck twice and he wasn’t breathing. i honestly believe my doctor saved his life because most would have forced c-section and the dr was like lets just get him out vaginally now! if they would have waited to do the c-section he wouldn’t have lived. cameron spent 13 days in the nicu and is now perfect! people don’t believe all the problems he had because at 2 he is just amazing!
needless to say when baby #2 came along i was scared to death of a repeat. as luck would have it i had to be induced again because as i said i don’t know how to get babies out
pitocin is horrible. they started me slow on it and it took 4 hours before i was even feeling contractions. again #2 (connor) was faced the wrong direction so again i got to have back labor (and i labored in my leg which i thought was really strange and the worst pain ever!) and again the epidural didn’t work. however i wouldn’t change a thing about either birth experience…except the whole nicu and not breathing part 
i love that you are exploring all your choices. giving birth is a very personal experience and each time is different and each person is different. don’t let anyone give you shit about the way you want to do…not the drs, nurses, midwives, fairies, B or your internet friends. you get to be the boss about this!
i can’t wait to hear the rest of your story!
*sparkles*
The more I read about it, the more I’m thinking I must talk to some midwives when it comes time for me to grow my own crotch parasites. Good for you for researching and making a decision about how Plankton should arrive sparkle style! Love the outfit also.
Pitocin may be of the devil-they tried to induce me and I actually never went into labor. Never dilated, nada. So they ended up having to do an emergency c-section for a 10 pound baby that they said I couldn’t have birthed anyway.
And the c-section? Wasn’t so bad. I was so terrified of ripping and stuff that the c-section was a more appealing option to me.
But here’s the deal-for whatever reason EVERYONE on the planet seems to think their way is the ONLY way and that they have the right to decree how you should birth your baby burrito. I would exercise my middle finger a lot.
It will also come in handy for the random strangers that will start to molest you in Target and stuff.
MODG – I think you’re just super sparkle full of awesomes. I love your post and I love that you have done so much research in figuring out ALL your options, and deciding from that what will ultimately be best for you. Everyone is different and everyone’s opinions are just that – opinions. What is right for some of the more experienced moms above might obviously not be the right choice for you so good for you for sticking to your guns with your decision. Laughing in your face deserves a throat punch for sure.
You’re super sparkle brave. I hope I’m as brave in 8 months… right now I’m scared to google things like “mucus plug”, mostly because I have a fear of what images will come up. I’m early enough along that I can still live in that blissful bubble of ignorance for a little while longer
(of course all the while eating right and taking the right vitamins…)
Looking forward to your next post
I really do hope you have your baby naturally, because (and I am only speaking of myself) c-sections really f@$& you up. It’s not so much the physical recovery from having a c-section, it’s the psychological recovery. I endured 5 days of back labor pains before I actually went into real labor. I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone. They were the longest 5 days of my life. When my water finally broke on it’s own and I was admitted, the doctor decided to start me on pitocin to get the labor going. At that point I couldn’t take it anymore and asked for the epidural. And after all that pain and suffering, they decided 9 hours after active labor started, that a c-section was the best route since I was only dilated 5cm and the baby was starting to poop in there, so she had to come out. I did not cry at all when she was born because I honestly did not feel like I had given birth. I did not feel like she was my baby. I didn’t see her come out of me. I didn’t get to hold her right away. I felt robbed of that big climactic moment everyone woman expects. That bonding moment you talked about is so crucial, not so much for the baby, but for yourself. YOU are the one that has to like the baby, not so much the other way around. I honestly believe that had I not had a c-section and had I been able to have my baby “naturally”, I would not have suffered from PPD. Everything is great now, but I will admit that I refer the first year of her life (she’s going to be 2 in Sept) as the Dark Age, and that’s really sad. Oh, and it would really piss me off when people would tell me to just be grateful for having a healthy baby. Yeah, I was grateful and always will be, but it still sucked. So anyway, I wish you the best and applaud you for taking an active role in your child’s birth. You’re going to be a great mommy
And this is the OTHER side of my story. The failure and psychological mindfark of a c-section that sent me straight to a bottle of Celexa.
We are totally on the same page! I live in a bit of a hippie town where midwives are fairly prevelent in the “girl doc” world and there are a ton of us who are like you (not so hippiesh, but maybe a bit granola) who are totally into using a midwife and attempting natural childbirth. You can totally do it!
Giving birth without drugs was hands down the hardest most agonizingly painful thing I have ever done in life…BUT IT IS SO WORTH IT. I was 18 when I had my first son and was scared to death. I had walked in fully ready to give birth naturally and 6hours into labor I ended up getting a shot of Demerol b/c the nurses told me it would help with the pain since I was refusing an epidural. Well, giving someone Demerol that’s in the active phase of labor to help with the pain in like someone giving you Tylenol for your broken leg -_- DOESN’T HELP. So I ended up getting an epidural an hour later and then giving birth 2.5hrs later. It was a piece of cake after the epidural but to this day his whole birth is a fog in my mind…If it weren’t for pictures I wouldb’t even remember the moment they placed him on my chest for the first time.
And KNEW that I was going to give birth naturally. And I did! And the feelings that came over me after accomplishing that were inexplicable…it’s amazing! The hormones that release from your body create this insane warm glowy stupid ridiculously in love & high feeling. And I know that sounds so damn cheesy…But seriously.
After I got home I remember reading about the Stages of Labor again ( http://hubpages.com/hub/Stages-of-Labor ) and realizing that I was at the very end of the active phase of labor and ready to go into the Transitional phase (the worst and shortest part) and then I would have been DONE! But no one reminded me of that when I was in the hospital!
So my second go ’round I was a little older and wiser at the ripe age of 21
So having done it both ways I definitely prefer the natural experience solely b/c of the difference in HEALING and in bonding with my baby afterwards. But I don’t in any way consider the fact that I got an epidural my first go round an act of failure. Giving birth HURTS LIKE A BITCH and going in having never experienced it before you have no idea you know? You plan (and it’s GOOD to plan!) and you imagine what it will be like but until you actually get to the point where you’re giving birth, only then will you know for sure what you need in that moment.
Besides, in the end the only thing that really matters is that you get your sweet healthy baby safely in your arms. Right? Right.
You’re gonna rock this shiz Modg
Yes. YES YES YES YES YES. It has ALWAYS driven me crazy how women are induced and then they get a gd needle in their spines so they can’t feel a thing and then they’re not pushing hard enough and this that and the other. It’s ridiculous. Your body has ancient wisdom and it will know when it’s time. Let your body do its thing naturally! Everyone I know thinks women who go without the meds are crazy, but then again they’ve all given birth with the meds– so how should they know there’s a better way?
If one thing in this world is certain, it is that YOU can do anything you set your mind to. You will do great no matter what happens with your “birth story.” xo
So you know those annoying women who like to impart their experience on others? Yeah, that’s me. I will say that giving birth to a child is an ACCOMPLISHMENT no matter if it’s natural or not. I don’t think any person is better than another because they’ve experienced more pain. For me, I was planning on trying the natural route, but didn’t rule out drugs. My son was 11 days late and I had to be induced due to the amount of fluids (or lack thereof) left. They only gave me the Cervidil to soften my cervix and the contractions started. After 7 hours I was in so much pain that I finally gave in and got an epidural. Best decision I ever made. My best friend still quotes me yelling “Hurray for cathetars!”. I was able to sleep for awhile after that. The epidural wore off after my first hour of pushing (my son had no dropped stations AT ALL, but my water had broke hours before). The second hour was exhausting and just when I was telling myself it was my last push, there came my big ass baby. LIke huge.
Good for you for making your own decisions. I never ruled anything out, I just ended up doing what was right for me at that time. I would without a doubt get an epidural again if I ever accidentally get knocked up again. And I would still want a mid-wife cuz I’ve heard GREAT things!
Love & sparkles!
hi! i am no hippie either but at around 28 weeks pregnant i decided to actually plan a home birth since there are no birthing centers anywhere within four hours of my house! the more informed i became about what was likely to happen in a hospital, the more i wanted to stay far, far, away from them. i hate needles and strangers who think they know my body better than i do. the best way to pop out a kid is to be relaxed and there is no way i could ever relax in a hospital-hospitals are great for sick people-and while being pregnant may seem like some horrible illness (and at 32 weeks in now i am already very done!) i think our bodies know what they are doing in the majority of cases. my job will be to let my body do its thing when the time comes. we live 2 minutes away from a hospital and will absolutely transfer there in a heartbeat if anything starts to go wrong. and then i will know that i did what i could. in the meantime, i love my hippie midwife. another plus about being at a center or at home is you can scream as much as you want!! good luck! i am enjoying reading your posts!
A friend sent me a link to this post because I very recently wrote about my desires to go natural for my first birth experience (I am currently 34 weeks pregnant. Yikes.)
I freaking LOVE this post. And your whole blog, actually.
I am absolutely terrified, but so excited to give birth in a hospital birthing center with a midwife!
I’m visiting from The Bees Knees and a new follower
This is hilarious. I ended up with a c-section (and truth be told, as much as most women will attack me for it, I plan on forgoing the VBAC option in favor of a repeat c-section if I ever manage to find myself knocked up again…), and they had to cut my sports bra off of me because I had flat out refused to take it off during labor. I totally get it.
Damn, I miss that sports bra.
I vote sparkle bra!!! You know I’d totally be sporting one of those in labor.
I haven’t ever been pregnant, so, I can’t share any stories, but, the husband and I are getting to that point in which we want to have kids in the next year or so, so I’m starting to seriously think about birthing options, etc. I always thought I’d be all “I want drugs, and I want them now!”–and I might still be–again, I am not pregnant, so, really, this is just me rambling. But! I’ve heard so many people recently go about a more natural approach to childbirth and they’d had great stories and actually, much better recovery too! I’m hoping that when the time comes for me I’ll be able to find a nice balance between nature and medicine…. We shall see!
Good luck my sweet MODG. You will do great!
YES! Good for you
I have heard lots about this.. thanks for sharing. My mom had my sister, brother and myself all at home with the same midwife. I saw my brother born – he was 10lbs 12oz. The midwife was amazing and nothing seemed to phase her… anyway, I have heard lots of horror stories about hospital birth. Doctor’s who insist you be induced … turns out they have a tee time. Or whatever. LAME.
Good for you knowing your options and exercising them….and hello that bra is the hotness!!
Yeah, the Business of Being Born scared me shitless. Then, I did no research and preliminary doctor interviews like you did, and when I found myself pregnant, took a reference and ended up at the place I am now. I don’t know if I will think this in a couple months or a couple years, but I think I am okay with it. It is like a mixture of what I wanted. There is a collection of doctors AND midwives, and all of them, including the doctors, are pretty much hands-off in the vein of the midwives. So when the time comes, we can make it as natural or hospital-y as I want. Hopefully it works out. I just found out today that the baby is measuring 2 weeks ahead and is a giant monster baby, so she might come soon. I’ll let you know how the midwife/doctor combo goes.
P.S. Birthing costumes are a HUGE priority. Plan these before anything.
I’m glad you are educating yourself as much as you can. I’m also glad you are aware that things don’t go according to plan. Bc especially in childbirth, often times what you think & hope it will be like, the opposite happens. So it’s good to know pros & cons to many different scenerios, so you’re not upset or disappointed when the “real” plan, overrides the “birth” plan. So it’ll be interesting to hear your actual birth story in….wait, when are you actually due? (Sorry, I’m too lazy to do the math.)
MODG I think it is fantastic that you are making the decision to home birth!!
I had to have a c-section for my first as his fontenelles were fused so he could not ‘come down’ (and had major head surgery at 4 months old) and I had elective c-section for my second – not out of convience but I had had miscarriages, IVF and every manner of people (with doctorates and stuff not just everyday people) up my vagina that it was the safest option – I still bonded – and I still have my pelvic floor!!!!
Arn’t we lucky we live in Western countries that allow us to have a choice?
I like drugs. I want the drugs.
Maybe you could pretend to have a hospital baby and get the drugs and give them to me?
just some thoughts….
You so need that sparkle bra MODG! AS for the midwife, I am so with you on it. I always wished that I could’ve had a midwife, but I had a “special” pregnancy where i was having issues and needed a white coat (and eventually a c-section). But, my sister-in-law has a mid-wife and loves her. I told her, as I am telling you now, that you should still keep your mind open because childbirth is unpredictable! Good luck girl! And I so love reading about your journey!
Good for you! I have gone natural in 2 out of my 3 deliveries and I will tell you with 100% honesty, that it was SO MUCH easier going natural. I was induced in my 3rd and I was having contractions that were close to 3 minutes long. That is not natural. And I didn’t want an epidural but I got to the point where I had to and that was shitty because I had an allergic reaction to it and vomited for the next 8 hours. So go natural. The recovery is better. After my 1st kid I was at the mall shopping the day I was discharged from the hospital (I was in the military so I had to be at the hospital but the midwife still delivered for me there). After my 3rd (the one where I was so rudely induced) I was in bed for days. So be smart, don’t do drugs.
You’ll do great. You can definitely do it.
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Here’s a list of things you will probably never buy. Or feel the need for. So, obviously, I wanted to share this.
“But I believe that for one day in my life, I can do it.” AND THAT is why you will do it. If you think positively and realize it is only one day – or in my case five hours – out of your life you CAN do it. People who stress about it end up with C-sections and that shit sucks!
I totally feel your concerns. The birth of my first child was fast, so fast the doctor thought he had more time and did not get there until an hour after my son was born. I give all the credit to the nurses who were fabulous. So when I was pregnant with my daughter, I’m thinking “a breeze”. I was going to a great hospital, was going to use a mid wife. Well, never plan for a perfect delivery, cause it ain’t going to happen. She was 2 weeks late, come to find out I had no more fluid in me so they would induce with patocine (ms). So day 1 was a slow drip, not enough activity to produce labor, stop drip, start in the morning (mind you, I can’t eat anything either). Start again next am, faster drip this time. I did natural for my son & wanted to do the same for my daughter. Oh, no, that was not going to happen. OMG. And maybe the doctors can’t explain the pain because they have never experienced, but hell, it was bad. Epi time. I did not have a choice, for the health of my child, but if there is a choice, JUST SAY NO TO DRUGS. Good luck.