This is a special day of nudity. Hooray!
People make a big freaking deal about nudity. It’s either all secret and playboy or it’s all vulgar and sick or it’s embarrassing (like how I imagine horses to feel) or it’s just all of those things but someone calls it “art” so it’s cool. But on this day of nudity, we’re talking straight up function.
People get wild about nipple shots from breast feeders. They think it’s all girls gone wild, daycare style. Get your head out of your ass America, it’s not a big deal. Nipples were made to 1) pierce 2) name shots after and 3) feed your baby.
I didn’t realize just how uncomfortable people were with breastfeeding until one day, I was feeding G in my living room (fully covered) and the people at my house slooowly moved to the other side of the kitchen. Leaving me in my functional nippled corner. That’s when I realized that people need to get better about breastfeeding and karaoke. The Asians get us there despite that show Karaoke Battle USA (when they say USA, it’s always Asian).
Now. Brace yourselves for a picture of me breastfeeding.
EXPOSED. CALL THE INTERNET COPS. CALL HUGH HEFNER. CALL MY PERVY 11TH GRADE GYM TEACHER:
BAAAAAAAAAAAH MY NIPPLE!
OMG I totally tricked you. Do you believe that’s actually NOT my boob? I KNOW… YOU ARE SUCH AN IDIOT! It’s a hat. A hat that goes on your baby’s head. And most importantly, it’s a hat that says “You my friend are a pure asshole for caring at all about a boob in a baby’s mouth”
And any hat that has the ability to say asshole, is a friend of mine.
But most importantly, it’s funny and makes you laugh and makes you say “wow, nipples are not that big of a deal. I could stare at a nipple all day and not be phased. Nipples are for winners”
NIPPLES ARE FOR WINNERS.
Now the best part. I contacted the creator of this fine product at boobiebeanie.com about doing a giveaway and a discount for the MODG community. She said yes because she’s also a winner. Just like nipples.
I also requested the “ethnic boob”. Yes you have a choice in skin tone and nipple tone. I say go dark or go home.
**The first 30 people to order with the code MODG1 (all caps) will get free shipping on their boobie beanie**
**ALSO because the beanie lady is awesome, she is giving away 2 free beanies to MODG readers. Please leave a comment here telling me why you want the boob hat AND then you must like the beanie lady’s facebook page. I WILL CHECK, YOU KNOW I WILL.**
Go forth and be nippular.
xoxo
MODG BREAST
PS
for you MODG cat fans, that’s the rarely seen Willy. He will seriously cut you. He’s sporting the white girl hat. I will probably pay for this in my sleep. If you don’t hear from me soon, call the police.
The internet psychic says you would like this too:
Hi I’m MODG. But you can call me MODG. You say it like Modg, like a Grandma name. Not like M.O.D.G. That’s a lot of syllables and I don’t have that kind of time. 
{ 206 comments }
I don’t really need a boob hat as my baby is getting rather big for one but I would certainly put it on the cat.
LIKE
BFing didn’t work out for us
but I just wanted to say, you should totally put a small-ish hoop earring through one of those nips.
THAT is the best thing I have heard all day. bravo!
YES! The only thing that could possibly make that hat better is a piercing! Please someone buy these who has twins and post a picture
NIPPLES ARE FOR WINNERS!!! I’d totally slap one of those hats on my 12-month-old and nurse him in public. Actually I’d nurse him in public anyway, the hat just makes it that much more awesome. Sign me up!
The beanie lady’s facebook page link isn’t working…
check now. I fixed that business.
thank you
I tell you why I should win that hat.
My boobs really are as big as the hat. Seriously.
Notice how cute and snuggly you are Baby G are in the chair? All cradle-holdy and cute? Yea, that doesn’t happen when you wear a J CUP.
I’m 7.5 months into nursing my chubby Simon, and my boob is STILL bigger than his head. I still have to use “My Brest Friend,” which is my least favorite product name ever. A) because it sounds like my boob is my BFF and B) because they misspelled Breast.
So if my little adorable Simon wore that hat (I’ll take it in “ethnic boob,” I’m not scared), it would be an exact replica of what my boob actually looks like, albeit tanner. (like Danny, see what I did there? See? I deserve this)
Off to like the boobie beanie.
I wish I could *like* comments.
Ugh!!! I have the same problem….breastfeeding my 3.5 month old with size F/G boobs, still pretty reliant on the Brest Friend; I even ended up buying the inflatable version for travel. I keep trying to figure out the cradle hold, but my boob is so heavy it just falls out of his mouth. I was hoping it was just due to a lack of BFing experience on my (and my baby’s part). I’m definitely jealous of the moms I see who can just scoop up their babies in one arm and nurse without serious boob support engineering.
I am now almost 2 years into breastfeeding my daughter with my F/G boobs. I had really good luck with nursing the baby while laying on my side (although I didn’t get the hang of it until she was about 4 or 5 months old). It doesn’t really work in public, but it’s great at home. There’s an illustration here :
http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/breast-feeding/FL00096&slide=4
Can you imagine if I did it in public, though? Like, at the mall, just laid out on the floor? Hilarious. Yea, I never mastered side lying when he was a newborn and I just got in the habit of sitting up in bed nursing him. I am JUST NOW able to do the cradle hold with him, although I didn’t try for a long time so maybe it would have happened earlier. But now he’s in the fun distracted by EVERYTHING phase, so I just nurse him in his bedroom with my BFF My Brest Friend and low lighting so he will actually eat and not leave my nipple exposed for my 3 year old to talk about.
I’m 20 months in on breastfeeding with g/h boobs. (i wasn’t planning on nursing this long I just don’t know how to stop without having days of screaming. And by days I mean nights. My first just stopped at 11 months!) my boppy is what saved us. I don’t know what I would have done without it when he was little. I’d really like to win this although I’m afraid it wouldn’t fit on my kids giant head. My 20 month old wears size 3t/4t clothes and size 9 shoes and looks like a 3 year old. However he and my 3 year old LOVE hats and would just wear this out in public and offend people. Nipples are for winners!
There is an INFLATABLE MBF? How did I not know this? Dammit! Rebecca, it will come, just keep trying, but also just accept that we will never be one of those moms who, like my BFF with A-cup boobs, can cook dinner while nursing. P.S. I hate her.
I had an idea for an invention called the Titsling. I envisioned like a pouch that you clipped onto your nursing bra and slipped it over your boob so it would hold it up for you and you could have both hands free. Wouldn’t that be the best???
I did see some wacky boob boppy that was like a wedge pillow to shove under the bazonga!
I also went from my “normal” G/H boobs to J+ breastfeeding boobs. Not so fun. Everyone kept making fun of me because I kept saying how I had to hoist the boob out just to nurse – but that’s literally what you have to do! We lasted 6 months before Vivian weaned herself (she probably had had enough of this crap – she was getting pretty bored of not being able to see anything other than my boobs every time she wanted to eat) and I have to say, I wasn’t upset at all. Bring on the breast reduction – they’ve done what they were supposed to do, now I want them gone!
I want a beanie hat because if my daughter E wears it while we’re breastfeeding, it may actually create an optical illusion of normal sized breasts. Each one of my breasts is now larger than my child’s head. And she is now 4 months. I had large breasts before having a child, they are now a terrifying size. I’ve had way too many sentences from lactation start with “when I have a mom with breasts larger than her child’s head…” Please please may I have a beanie hat so I can pretend for a few moments that my breasts are not insane. PS I will also put it on my cat’s head for fun.
I totally want my little 7.5 month old dude to rock this hat when my husband’s friends are over. They never look anywhere near me if I’m nursing.. if they check out my baby’s hat I’ll be all, FFFUUU dude quit looking at my nipple you fucking PERVS! Yeah.
This hat is awesome.
I want a boob hat! Why? Because I want to be an awesome asian like MODG! Okay, no really I never even comment on MODG’s blog entries but I do frequent MODG blog. I also breastfeed my 6 week old daughter and think it’s hilarious when people freak out about boobage and adding a nipple hat into the mix may make them come in for a better look. Or make people run away.
Either is fine with me.
I so totally need the boob hat…to offend my mother in law!
I’m right there with you, AngieS. My MIL actually asked me if I had considered pumping only (as in, baby never eats from breast and I am either pumping, washing pump, or feeding baby at all times) so that her son and I would be on equal footing in the feeding-bonding category. Seriously???
I want the boob hat because nipples ARE for winners. And winter is coming and my 2 month olds head will be cold and I think I would actually start nursing in the middle of the mall instead of finding the nursing mothers corner just so I can watch peoples reactions. It would be an amazing form of entertainment for me.
PS The FB link isn’t working, but I searched on FB and found who I hope is the right person. I wouldn’t think Boobie Beanies would be that popular of a middle name, but you never know these days…
Oops! Never mind, apparently that was her personal page…saw you fixed the link now anyhow.
I want this hat!! I’m nursing my five month old and at first I was all weird about nursing in public and now I do not give a fuck. I whip the nip out everywhere. I enjoy making people feel as uncomfortable as possible so I would make my baby wear this and nurse in public solely to make haters get awkward. Also, I would make my cats take turns wearing it.
I want a boob hat because I don’t care what people think about me breastfeeding in front of them! I am usually very modest, but when it comes to feeding my baby, it’s a different story. I think the beanies are an awesome way to show a nipple without getting arrested.
I have wanted a boob hat forever! I have made lots of friends with new moms and I try to encourage being comfortable with NIP (nursing in public) I think anything that promotes comfort with breastfeeding women is awesome. I hope someone who is uncomfortable with NIP will see me and be inspired to do it too! The hat would help. and yes, I have liked the beanie lady on facebook-or maybe I liked bring the boobie beanie back, if that is the same thing….
Oh man oh man. I NEED THAT IN MY LIFE. I’m all knocked up with #2 and #1 was on the tit fo-eva. I have big knockers (got up to an H when I was nursing, currently sitting at a painful DDD, thanks hormones) and got a lot of crap when I breastfed and man, I would love to make #2 wear a boob hat. I’ll also take an ethnic boob because…BLAM! I’m a brown person. Though, I’d be just as happy with a giant white boob. I believe it would just make people stare more and I’m cool with that. Also, I’ll send you a gallon bag of cereal marshmallows to sweeten the deal.
Also, since we are sharing horror stories, my in-laws would try to make me go to different room with only a metal folding chair and lock the door when it was time to feed #1 because they were so disturbed. I’d really like to torment my in-laws with a giant boob hat on the baby.
WTF?? Did they smear feces on the wall and make you wear a straight jacket? Jesus, what a nightmare. You totally deserve the hat.
No, but they did feed my 2 week old mashed bananas (Gerber stage 2) and then tried to feed him raw beef at around 2 months old. Also, I was told it was disgusting that I put Laniosh on my baby registry because *gasp* its for your nipples! They didn’t want their friends seeing that.
stop it! I thought I was the only one whose in-laws asked me to remove things from my registry that were for my nipples! I took great pleasure in nursing right in front of them at every opportunity
I want one for my son who is due in the next few weeks. I am planning on breastfeeding him where ever he may get hungry.
Nipples do rock! Would love to win one!
Awesome! I’m going to be a first time mommy very soon, and I think the boob beanie would be a great accessory. Also do they make beanies with bigger nipples, because I feel like mine have gotten huge haha.
Why I should win. I have REALLY uneven boobs. When my son would be wearing the hat while nursing in public it would at least make me look more even. Pretty sure I get more looks from the extreme unevenness then from the nursing in public. Help a sista out.
And
I have really small boobs to begin with and would love to have a stand-in hat to make me look like I have at least one monster boob while my son is nursing.
I do not have a baby, but I have several friends that are about to have babies and I think this might be the best baby shower present ever. I must give this to someone. Immediately,.
Sooooooooo—– that hat is simply spectacular.
I would love a hat like that for my 3 month old, who is currently treating my nipple like a piece of chewing gum. Kill me now. My son sleeps best when boobs are on, near, or around his head, so perhaps a hat just like this one is what the doctor ordered for him. Hell, maybe I will fill a water balloon with pudding, stuff it inside the hat, duck tape it my husbands chest, and let him participate in the fun. Awesome hat. Oh- and I bought some of the dry shampoo you recommended- it’s pretty awesome!
hey does the dry shampoo smell good? I want to get some but I am gun shy….other dry shampoo that I’ve bought smells awful…..
I need a boobie beanie!
After my c-section I turned into a nudist it was just way too much of a bitch for me to nurse with the gown and tubes everywhere. When the OB GYN resident came by to check my incision she flipped out over my exposed breasts…career change much.
Anyway…ever since then I have made it a point to feed my daughter when she needs to be fed. In the bar…check! On the highway…check! At work…check! I can’t stand nursing covers…I need a boobie beanie!
Points for nursng after a section- HARD. I would have punched that nurse in the face…um weren’t you the same one that was “manually checking” my dilation like 24 hours ago. Argh, hospitals piss me off. Anyway, keep it up!
I want a boob hat because I don’t have kids and I’m not gonna unless I adopt so even then I can’t feed them from my boobs. Any kid I raise is going to need to have something to wear to the therapist on cold days.
Did you know you CAN breast feed adopted children. Just in FYI in case you really want to – my friend did it. Google it if you are interested
OHMYGAWD hilarious… I would like to hand these out at every future baby shower I go to!!!
I NEED a boobie beanie because I’m knocked up, AGAIN and my littlest is turning one tomorrow. Which means I’ll have ANOTHER mouth to feed and I’ll be nursing and not having any fun for another year. Plus, I’ve been in love with those hats since I first saw them but have always been too lazy to actually purchase one…or I forget about it.
My little one turned one today too! and I am also knocked up with #2! how funny. when are you due? maybe we are boobie soul sisters
I want one because their sweet. My kiddo on the way would no doubt rock it
Holy moly!! I love this post! I wish I had a hat like this for my daughter. You are so right about people being completely spooked out over nursing your baby/toddler. It’s a total culture thing.
This product is amazing. Frankly, I don’t care if I don’t win because I WILL be buying one. Here’s why I will. I had a guest over and we were talking about breastfeeding since I’m pregnant and plan to. She goes, “Well, I will not breastfeed. I am not a food source.”
Umm….yes you are?! So I would like this beanie to wear the next time she comes over after the baby. I and will steal a page from the MODG book and sit just. like. that. as she arrives. Food source my ass.
She’s not a “food source”? What is her placenta? A bag of pureed McDonald’s? What a dumbass.
Your friend sounds like a capital B. Sorry.
Oh, she’s not my friend. Notice I said “guest.” Don’t apologize!
This has sister in law written alllll over it.
or some other in law.
That is just too awesome for words…which is why I must have this. Fall is approaching and I still have another 8-10 months of nursing ahead of me. Need this just for the looks I’d get, CLASSIC!
Ha I totally love this I wish I had one when I was BF my son.. that lil boy there I could not wean, he finally weaned when he was 2 1/2! and yea it seems like forever but I noticed that if I nursed him out in public as a lil baby people would migrate somewhere else even had family members tell me thats awful give him abottle because that looks nasty oo I got so mad, I was sorely upset when my 9 wk old daughter has decided she no longer wants to nurse, but she still does a little sometime.. but I dont see the big deal people should get offended when mothers dont even try to breastfeed because their to lazy! more power to u guys!
I’m nursing my baby as I read this and she just latched onto skin that was definitely NOT my nipple and as I’m guessing you know, that sucks. That’s why I deservea boob hat for my little nursling. That and I got braces this week and have a cleaning on Friday and it sucks and I’m totally throwing a pity party for myself.
I want the boob hat because we have boob pillows (made by a college friend) and I love the looks visitors give the pillow… almost like they are looking at something dirty and they’re waiting to get yelled at. My little guy is almost 6 months old, and it’s taken the majority of that time for me to get comfortable enough nursing in public to mock the people who are desperately trying to pretend that I’m invisible since I have a boob out. The hat would make their heads explode.
I need this hat, my tah-tahs have never been the same after popping out 3 girls in 3 years. I’ll order a 2nd one, strap them on my boobs and pretend the girls head due north, instead of skimming the lower levels of hell…
Totally want the boobie beanie. Maybe I can bring my baby to work in it and feed him there.
PS: I am a teacher.
This is super, I just love nipple shots while nursing in public, real or knit. I just returned form a 9 hour flight and the poor man next to me had to see my exposed nipple for god only knows how long as my son and I both fell asleep. I mean the least he could have done was tuck it back in or something. Am I right?
LOL, totally. what an asshole.
i like reminding people that we all used to suck on our mom’s tits. i’m mature like that.
Nipples ARE for winners! I need a boobie hat to make people wonder what the eff my baby is wearing on her head.
And maybe to make people uncomfortable…because I’m all about that.
I wish i had seen these before. I would SO love one for my next baby!! I’d put one on a cat if i had a cat, But if i had a pair of them i would put them on my weiner dogs. So Could you imagine Boobies and Weiners now that pic would be removed!!
I should win the boobie hat because I’m breasfeeding twins. And I sometimes feed them at the same time. I have pictures to prove it. BOOM! I WIN! (I should disclose I have to supplement bc of their NICU stay, so I’m only 50% badass. Sads. But every drop counts!!!)
Laura, how great would it be to have two different color boobie beanies for the times you’re tandem nursing the twins?? My 19 month old twins tandem nurse but beanies wouldn’t do us any good now because they prefer to expose my real breasts as they pop off and on and do nursing acrobatics (like one squatting to nurse and poking her sister in the head at the same time). It’s fabulous that you’re nursing your two little ones!
I would love a Boobie Beanie for my little girl due in November. I support breastfeeding, especially breastfeeding in public and even if I dont want to whip out the real thing for all to see, people can get an epic view of the boobie beanie!
I don’t BF (caught onto the mommy lingo here) cause I don’t have a baby and probably won’t til I’m 40. But I would like one of these hats for myself to keep me warm on the slopes, just think of all the hotties I could puck up wearing this gem. I mean what a better way to break the ice? “is that a nipple on your head?!” Exactly. And it would look awesome to all the people on the lift as I board below them. Then maybe one day when I marry said hottie, I can use it on my baby. Ok, I just said that last part cause I don’t want anyone to think I’m so selfish as to try and win a nipple beanie meant to keep some cold babies head warm. But I might one day put down the bottle long enough to conceive…go nipples
I love these hats!! Awesome. Boobs for life!!
Holy guacamoly… I would seriously trade my husband for this hat. Then again, I would also trade my husband for a cupcake, or dvr, or sleep. I totally deserve this for breastfeeding for over a year now, its not all rainbows and butterflies when it comes to giving up my boobies for a year!
holy beejesus i would totally trade my husband in a heartbeat for a bag of swedish fish and four hours of uninterrupted sleep!!! and i miss my boobies too
I am a fan of Boobie Beanie on FB
I would like one to give to a good friend who is due with her first baby in November and is kinda shy. I think this will lighten her up a bit!
Ohh I’ve been wanting one of these for like a year now but I haven’t gotten around to buying one with a lot of other things going on in my life. My Little one is 10 months now and still nursing quite often. I think DH would also love this lol.
MODG-
I’ll cut to the chase and tell you why I’m the perfect soon to be breastfeeding mom to win this boob hat. It will freak my dad out. He’s all opinionated about pregnancy, babies, breastfeeding, feet, or anything. He assumed I’d be formula feeding and told me he can get a discount on similac ( have no idea how, he works at a BEER brewery). I told him I won’t be using formula, so he asked “…. Well, what will you use, then?” I told him I’ll be breastfeeding. Enter horror music and panic. “the TIT!?!?” he asked. Yes, Dad. The tit.
This beautiful boob hat would be a perfectly subtle cover up to break the ice.
OMG, that is awesome. I’m calling it “THE TIT” from now on. Loud like that.
Oh man, crying laughing, “the tit”!
I’m due in 2 weeks, it’s getting cold already in Wisconsin, and there will soon be tits everywhere. I live in a co-op where a few folks are already getting a little nervous about my plans to birth at home, so this will make it extra fun
I desperately need a boobie beanie!!! First of all I live in South Carolina, aka the bible belt. As a card carrying hippie (I’m a returned Peace Corps volunteer) I consider it my duty to make some stuffy junior league ladies crap their Lilly Pulitzer pants when they see me nursing with the boob beanie on my baby. Second, my in-laws annoy the living shit out of me and I’m fairly sure that if they saw this they’d be so uncomfortable that they wouldn’t come back until my son is at least 16. They have commented multiple times that formula is “better for babies.” WTF. They also still can’t understand why I make my own organic baby food. When my son first started solids they suggested I either add Karo syrup or crush up m&ms and mix it into his rice cereal “so he’d like it better.” He weighs 33 pounds and is 35″ long at 10 months, so I’m fairly certain “liking it better” isn’t a problem. Plus they eat at chick-fil-a, mcdonalds and bojangles at least once a week, respectively, so I don’t think we need their healthy eating tips. Cheers to being that eccentric hippie daughter-in-law who does crazy shit like breastfeeds and cooks
Ginny, I salute you, brave hippie in S Carolina. M&Ms????? That is the most insane mil comment I have come across yet. Keep on keeping on, sister. Don’t let them break you down!
OMG I need this hat in my life. Like yesterday! I boob fed my daughter and she is …wait for it …. ONE YEAR OLD! I know right! I’m totally awesome, but apparently the rest of the world doesn’t think so. They are all like “your gonna be one of those weirdos who breastfeed until their baby is 5″ and I’m all like…..”OK you got me! I WILL!” So I already get the stares, and I want this nipple hat to stare proudly right back at them! I also hope with this hat that people will come up to me and be like “wtf” and I’ll be like “yep. BREASTFEEDING IS THE ISH, and you should give the boob as long as you can!!!” and then maybe I can inspire people that boobs aren’t “weird” like society wants you to think, they are amaze and maybe I can inspire more people to bf or the people who do not feel ashamed. (Brianna, stand up to your in-laws! That is just right. Don’t be ashamed and if they don’t feel “comfortable” around it, ask them if they are more comfortable with your baby eating or not eating! Or just invite them over for dinner and make them sit in the garage with their plate on the floor. Say you don’t feel “comfortable” with the way they eat!!!) lol BOOBIE POWERRR!!!
Instead of putting it on my pets head, I will be putting it on my saggy boob for my husband so he can pretend it pretty again 
Also, I need this hat because my boobs are more like sag bags now, and with this hat I can pretend at least one titty is big and beautiful and perky again! I’m only 22 and my knocks look like old ladies
If I don’t win just wanted to say thanks modg! You always make me laugh!!
I have old lady tits, too! I’m 23. Its what the babes do to us. I’m terrified of what they’ll look like after I have #2 and finish that stint of boobie nomming.
We ended up just telling them that either the baby eats or they don’t get to see him.
With my first baby I wore a bra 24hrs a day from early in pregnancy all through breastfeeding because I thought I could stop the freefall to the center of the earth my breasts would otherwise do. I was wrong. Feeding baby 2 now and I have surrendered. The boobs have fallen. That’s just the way it is.
It’s amazing how quickly the room clears when I am breastfeeding my 10 month old son. My father in law is always the first to leave the room. I might just have to buy one for each of my children!
Oh my gosh, I NEED this hat for my little guy. I am going to see the in-laws next month and they are ultra Cleaver-esque. This would be awesome to have him wear it when I nurse him in front of them!!
yay! booby hat… its going to be cold soon and I would love one!!! and I am already a fan of the boobie beanie on FB.
I’d love a hat! Still nursing my 14 month old!
first of all let me say that breastfeeding is the most wonderful thing in the world. i breastfed all 3 of my boys my youngest for a full year and a half! my family doesnt agree with e all the time cuz when my cousin was pregnant they didnt tell me til 3 weeks before she had the baby! i asked her why and they said because they didnt want me to harrass them about breastfeeding.. (i asked her once if she was going to breastfeed and offered to buy her a pump if she was; how is that harrassing?!?!) anyway, a friend of mine just had a baby girl and she is breastfeeding and i told her about these awesome hats and she would love one. thank you much and great job getting the word out on baby’s first happy meal!
And I am a fan!
I would love a booby beanie! My baby girl Olivia Joy will not let me use anything to cover her while she breastfeeds. So it would be fun to use one of these beanies instead!
I so want the boob hat!! I had the exact same thing happen to me… Was breastfeeding my 4 month old in MY own home, completely covered and all of our visitors left the room and me, in mid-conversation no less. Also, my inlaw give me the side-eye every time I talk about breastfeeding my son at until he is a year. Nipples are nbd and only for WINNERS.
I neeeeeeeed the boob hat. I will be supplementing my nursings with daddy-bottle-feedings (pumped boob milk) and so we will need this hat so that there can still be a breastial presence during his feedings.
I love that beanie! I would love to win it because I am slowly getting everyone around me used to breastfeeding in public. My neighbor told me the other day when I offered for her to borrow my nursing cover that she didn’t believe I owned one. She is so used to me just ‘whipping it out’. That hat would be totally awesome come this winter!
I like the ‘Bring Back Boobie Beanie’ page!
I would really love a boob hat, as I just found out today that I’m pregnant with baby number two!!! This baby is going to be a healthy, boob fed babe (in about 9 months).
Breast feeding wasn’t a long term success with my first, as I got a severe breast infection about six weeks in…but this time, I’m doing things a little differently and making it work!! And, having the boob hat would be a wonderful way to help things along.
Congrats! What great news!
Best. Nipplehat. Ever.
I deserve this hat because I’m tandem nursing an almost 2 year old and a 3 month old <3 I would let them take turns wearing it, but it would be all extra funny to let my toddler, (who would think that hat rocks out loud, btw) wear it in public, so that the stares are even more outrageous
Plus I promise to make my husband wear it too, and to take pictures of it 
This is the single most important accessory I’ve ever seen in my life everever. I want it. I need it. A dark one. Actually two, but obvs I need one to be quite a bit smaller than the other cuz thats how my girls roll.
I want the hat because I wasn’t done making my in-laws uncomf last year while I breastfed at Christmas. I want it because my MIL asks me every single time I see her how long I plan to breastfeed. I want it because every time I tell her, “I’m not sure, but I’d like to for at least a year,” she tells me that that’s a, “ambitious endeavor.” I want it because after I have a good laugh after feeding my daughter at the inlaw’s dinner table while wearing it, I’m going to sneak into my MIL’s room and stuff it down her throat. Lovingly.
I need the hat, modg. Do the right thing.
I hope you win.
Why is it that people (in-laws) are always asking how long we plan on breastfeeding? I always say something smart ass like, “well, until he’s full I guess.”
I need this for the exact same reason you do!! So funny!!!
I liked Bring Back Boobie Beanie.
I laughed out loud at least 5 times reading this post. My boyfriend thinks I’m crazy.
I want one of those boob hats more than you know. Because I know a couple of cats that need to be photographed wearing a boob hat. And because the baby girl I’m about to pop out any day needs a hat to keep her head warm. There’s no hat warmer than a boob hat.
freakin genius. my child will wear it in the middle of summer when he’s 3 years old and still nursing. kidding. sort of
I must have this hat. I nurse in public without a cover anyways, but this would make it a million times better. No, a bajillion!
My 13 month-old loves the boobie. He cannot look anywhere but my boobs when I change. He has no reservations to grab me or pull them out on a whim. He thinks low-cut tops are an invitation to motorboat. And while nursing on one side you can guarantee he’s playing with the nipple on the other. He should have a hat to commemorate his favorite thing in the whole world.
I have one; boobie beanies are hilarious. Eric looks so good in it, plus it has the extra added bonus of offending the old fuddy duddys.
The hat should go to us because my daughters initials are OB and those are the only letters in BOOB….
the beanie is pure awesome! I remember seeing one last year – at the time, I thought I’d be through breastfeeding any day, so i didn’t get one – but surprise! I’m still going! My son is 17 months – we had a really rocky start and I never had a great supply, but I swear the boob is my magic wand – it’s a miracle that I’m thankful for everyday!
I need one so that I can have a boob bigger than my son’s head again (he has a REALLY big head & despite that, when he was born, his giant head was dwarfed by my epic 34G boobs & it made for a hilarious photo!). That & he’s outgrown all his hats already (he’s 9 months old & his head is only 6 centimetres smaller than mine).
i would love to have that hat because it would look awesomely cute on my almost 4month baby that is rubbing all of his hair off while he breastfeeds
I wish I saw this hat 9 months ago when B was born. Love it. I’m telling my husband we are definitely having baby #2 now so that baby will wear it all the way through. But in the meantime….I want it so I can scare trick or treaters in my neighborhood. How awesome would that be?!
I would love to slap that Asian boob on my kid. I love nipples, he loves nipples, and that asian boob would express our nipple love to the world.
Love it! I love all of the support for letting it all hang out. I hate nursing covers and have pretty much always nursed in public. If anyone wants to look, go for it. You can’t see anything anyway. I love nothing more than getting into an argument with someone about how we should be able to breastfeed whenever and wherever we want for as long as we want. I cannot stand ignorant people who think breastfeeding past a year will lead to a needy kid who can’t be away from mommy. This hat is awesome and so is my new favorite acronym I saw in one of the earlier comments: NIP (Nursing in Public).
I actually did a breastfeeding in public post last month – and it includes a MODG shout-out i(with link) n the first paragraph. http://countingdowntildaddy.com/2011/08/14/you-have-to-do-what-you-have-to-do-wherever-you-have-to-do-it/
I never thought I needed one of these but your description has me convinced I should buy one. What’s up with people being freaked out about nursing?!
I want the boob hat because it is awesome and I want to put it on my child and wear it in front of my friend who said that it’s not okay to breastfeed in front of her husband. Bitch.
I don’t have kids, but this made me want to buy this hat for when I do. I even showed my bf and he laughed and said “that’s awesome”. Nips for life.
I NEEDS this hat. Several reasons…i want the disgusted looking park goers to see me smiling at them with the “oh I know you looked” look when they look at me feeding my kid. Two: I want to pierce the top for extra effect. Three: even when I stop breastfeeding eventually it’ll make my boobs still look big, like one megaboob.
Funniest shit ever. I love that nipple. I would love an ethnic one too.
I am thinking about procreating again in the early spring, this nipple cap just may convince me to jump on the baby train again sooner. Holy Love. I wonder what my husbands conservative family would think at Christmas if i popped this bad boy out? Oh the fun to be had. lol
Well I don’t NEED the hat but I’d LOVE one! I have wanted one for over a month but my husband won’t buy me one and since I’m staying at home I don’t have much money of my own and I live in Wisconsin where winters are ridiculously cold and my daughter needs a hat anyway. Oh and because I emailed you about boobie beanies last month when I found them because I knew how perfect they’d be for you! So pick me!
I don’t need a boob hat as already have 3 children, but I am pretty sure my boxer would look amazeballs in it. I guess after I finished taking pictures of my dog Layla in the boob hat I would give it to one of my boob feedin’ girlfriends
Smart Mama! I like your attitude and appreciate your honesty. Whether I win or not, I’d be happy to buy one of your great boobie beanies! They are superbly clever!
Thanks so much for being a mama who us willing to stick up for her kids’ health and well being.
I want this hat because I’m like a career breast feeder. Also, because I nurse my son at the hockey game and that fact alone makes me feel like a rockstar momma. Plus, how fun to get him all dressed up for a chilly day with a “cold boob” type nipple on his head.
I want this hat to piss off my husband. He’s so freaked out by my boob exposure in public – I can’t take it anymore. This hat *would* let him know that he is being a pure asshole for caring at all about a boob in a baby’s mouth. Word.
Don’t send me one because I got nothing to put it on, but I just have to say: NIPPLES ARE FOR WINNERS. Yay. About time that people just be okay with this. I would really like to see a ring on that nipple. Just sayin’.
this is the best thing i’ve ever seen. i love breast feeding – mostly because it’s helped me loose the baby weight (i know, i’m a horrible mother) and before EBN gets too big (she got lots of rolls) to fit into one of these hats i need to show up at my in-laws and make them super uncomfortable. THANKS!!
I so totally want that hat! I will make my baby wear it EVERY time he nurses…ESPECIALLY in public and in front of my nipple-phobic family!
I need that hat because it’s the only way I can get my husband to look at my nipple these days.
My babe is 4 months old and she needs a boob hat. I’m thinking we will bust it out over the holidays and disgust my uptight stepgrandmother.
I would love a boobie beanie! These things are awesome! My daughter would look so cute in it!
I want, I want, I want. I would love a hat that says the same things as my face. It would save me a lot of effort on bothering to speak. Pick me!
I love these hats! I have been meaning to get one. Im still nursing my 14 month old and would totally love a hat like this to deter stares an glares.
That is the BEST thing I’ve ever seen! I love it. Would love a boobie beanie, but I live out here in Hong Kong. People here still think breastfeeding is not a normal thing. It’s really sad. People take over the nursing rooms to feed bottles to their babies! However, I think it is the best thing you can do for your baby(s) if possible and I hope I can keep going til my bubba is a year old! He’s now a chubby 5 month old. BTW, I LOVE your blog and I love the way you write and I can relate to all the jokes that you make!
that is so funny and cute! hahaha
Ok, these hats ROCK!! I can’t wait for baby 3 to hurry up and get here so he/she can start wearing a BOOBIE BEANIE!! I’m cheap and a little bit handy, so when I saw that Ms. Boobie Beanie lady also will sell you her pattern so you can crochet your own, I was so there! I have made two so far in different sizes. And o btw, they are available in adult sizes too! I think my whole family will be rockin’ these hats while I nurse the new little one. Like everywhere we go.
This hat is AWESOME!!! What a great idea! I am totally pro-breastfeeding and would love to make a statement with the hat. We are currently trying for #2 so timing would be great!
I NEED THIS FOR MY FRIEND!!! She’s due in December. Her hubby will either love or hate it and it’s definitely worth it either way.
I need this hat fo’ sho because I am knocked up with Number #2 and my firstborn is turning 1 today! boobs are my life.
I need this hat.
Instead of running for the hills when i BF my 9 months old daughter, my family (in-laws, too) seems to move closer to me, as if my boob has a gravitational pull to it. I am really super glad that my brothers-in-law aren’t freaked out by boobs in babies mouths, but when their mother pulls my nursing cover back to inspect the latch in the middle of a holiday party, I cannot help but feel exposed. If I had this hat, then they could be half way across the room and see all the nip they want.
My 18 mo is dying laughing at the pic of your cat with the nip hat. And now pointing to G’s diaper and saying poopoo….and now to your “boob” saying booboo. Um, I did NOT teach him that one.
How genius is that hat – it is sooo adorable! I am expecting Baby Number 2 and want one!
Oh sweet jesus…
When I read the title, I could feel my blood pressure raise a little bit. But I couldn’t look away – it was like a train wreck, I had to see the carnage. Was I ever relieved when then were no actual boobies in your post.
I’m sorta in the middle on the breastfeeding liberation act.
On one hand: I can’t see any harm with mothers feeding their children as long as it’s done tastefully. I have a friend who could get her son in place and begin feeding without even a ninja noticing her. And she was always good about making sure the people immediately around her were comfortable before she started. And she added an appropriate amount of coverage so it wasn’t awkward.
On the other hand, I have a family member who’s far too boob friendly. She will pull it out long before her kid is ready to feed, leave it out and then openly feed in front of the crowd at Starbucks. And don’t you dare move away or seem uncomfortable or you’re going to hear about how it’s natural and you’re weird for having an issue with it.
I think that the USA (Asian) is still really puritanical whether we like it or not. We’re all programmed from an early age that nudity (along with so many other things) is wrong (especially in public). While I fully support the breast feeders out there, I think that there has to be an allowance and respect for the knee-jerk reaction some of us have. Especially those of us who do not have boobies in our daily lives. It’s like being around someone with a hair lip or lazy eye; gay men are never sure of boob etiquette. Do we look at it? Do we not? Do we compliment it? Why is there so much hair?
So, if some people migrate away during the feeding process, it’s not cause we’re all like, “OMG…hairy boob. Gross.” We just don’t know how to act. It’s as much about respecting the fact that you’re partially naked as it is about our comfort level.
I really “like” this post.
THANK YOU FOR THIS COMMENT!! I agree with you 100%!!
I dont care if you need to breast feed in public moms, I am all for it, but please at least make an ATTEMPT to cover it up. I really dont want to see your boob while I am trying to eat my sandwich.
Now, before you start attacking me, please know that I am not referring to the majority of breast feeding moms out there who arent out to rub it in our faces. I am talking about the really crazy ones that literally flop a boob out on the table in a restaurant, on a plane, wherever, then get their panites in a bundle if you turn the other way. If you want me to respect your need and right to feed your baby how you choose, please respect my right and desire to not have ginormous boobies shoved in my face while I am trying to eat, get my coffee, etc. Respect goes both ways, if you want it you have to GIVE it.
Ok, I sort of knew this perspective would come up. Part of me does agree with you. That’s the part that gets a gut reaction when I see a naked boob in public. I get it. But part of me feels this way:
for months I was terrified to leave the house with my child for fear that he would be hungry and I couldn’t get to a private place in time, because of attitudes like this. And I understand that you said “you’re fine with breastfeeding in public but cover up”. Here’s the thing, ANY opinion whatsoever about breastfeeding that is negative, makes an already self conscious mother more self conscious. Do you have any opinion about a mom feeding her baby a bottle in public? Many baby’s like my stubborn mule of a child won’t take a bottle. AND many babies refuse to nurse under those ridiculous tents. It gets hot and hard to breathe. And honestly, nothing about breastfeeding has to do with you or your face or rubbing it around your face. That comment gets me. Like when people say, “go ahead and be gay, just don’t rub it in my face”. I mean really?
It’s really not easy for a breastfeeding mom out there and that so many people have so many opinions. In a perfect world, people like you just wouldn’t care one way or another. You wouldn’t care about a mom who wants to cover up and you wouldn’t care about a mom who doesn’t. Because you have no idea why she’s in the situation she’s in. But I promise, it’s not to spite you. It actually has nothing to do with you at all. It’s really just about feeding a kid. And the more people do it, the more people see it, the less sensitive people are about it. And hopefully the less sensitive your face will be from all the rubbing and whatnot.
This article changed the way I thought about this subject forever.
http://thebabeandbreast.blogspot.com/2011/07/real-reason-not-to-cover-up-nursing.html
I don’t know of anyone how has an easy life though (other than Suri Cruise of course). I don’t think anyone is trying to make life harder breastfeeding mothers. Just like I don’t think you’re intentionally trying to make people uncomfortable by breastfeeding.
Yes, breastfeeding is difficult. Being a parent period is difficult but you sign up for the good and the bad. Taking a kid out ANYWHERE is a work of art that takes proper planning and about ten million times more work than you expect. But I think there has to a balance. You can’t expect others to respect your comfort level with breastfeeding if you don’t respect theirs. In an ideal world maybe people wouldn’t care if you were breastfeeding. But in a ideal world dogs would also poop Skittles. I don’t think either will happen any time soon so we both have to live with our disappointment and figure out a compromise.
My point was this: some people won’t care. Some will. And just like you want them to respect your right to breast feed, you have to respect their right to not want to see it. It’s a two-way respect street. Everybody has different tolerances and preferences. Maybe the real solution is somewhere in the middle, like providing a comfortable space for breast feeding parents. Maybe a more private booth in a restaurant. So you’re not secluded in a bathroom but anyone outside of your party won’t be made to feel awkward with the juice bar in your blouse being open for business. But I don’t think that the answer is saying that everyone should be okay with something because you are. That’s a slippery slope.
I also think it’s a reach trying to draw a comparison between the plight of the breast feeder and of the LGBT community. Let me know when you have a beer bottle broken over your head for being a breast feeder. Or when your marital rights are stripped because you wanna feed the boob juice to your tot.
Just my two cents though. As India.Arie says “don’t be offended/ these are only my opinions/ain’t nothin’ that I’m saying law.”
If you go back to my comment and read more carefully, you will see that I never said “I am fine with breast feeding in public, but cover up”. I said “at least please make an ATTEMPT to cover it up”. Big difference. H-U-G-E. I then make sure to clarify that I am not talking about the MAJORITY of breast feeding mothers out there, that I am talking about the ones that go out of their way to let it all hang out and deliberately not make any attempt to be discrete about it. And YES, they are out there, and YES they do it to rub it in our faces just to get a rise out of people.
And i find it interesting that you say “nothing about breastfeeding has to do with you or your face or rubbing it around your face” When basically the entire premise of your blog today was doing exactly that by having your baby wear a boob beanie, and more than half the comments were all about how these women couldnt wait to get one to make others uncomfortable (although some of them deserved it) How are you being understanding of people who are uncomfortable staring at you while you breastfeed, so they politely make their way to the other side of the room, and your response is to have your kid wear
“a hat that says “You my friend are a pure asshole for caring at all about a boob in a baby’s mouth”? What did they do that was so wrong and “asshole-like?” Maybe it was making them uncomfortable, or maybe they were giving you some privacy, either way, you got to feed your baby when he needed to be fed and how you want to feed him (via the boob), and they didnt have to stare at your boob. Sounds like a win-win to me.
I am 100% PRO BFing and I plan to do it with my own, but I also plan on being considerate of others as best I can.
you guys totally didn’t read the article, did you?
I just don’t understand why everyone gets SO worked up over feeding a baby. Because that’s ALL it is, is feeding a baby.
And I have to say, I love you both, but I’m not super surprised that neither of you had to deal with this yet or ever. Talk to me when you have kids/learn to lactate.
Jamie, I think you just crossed a line with your last comment. That’s offensive and I’m sorry you have so much anger in you. The article was about the benefits of being open about breastfeeding so future women can also breastfeed because it’s a learned behavior. The more open the better. But of course we’re dealing with opposition from many people who share your opinions. It’s sad and I’m sorry you feel this way. Let’s end it here.
MODG – that’s a pretty big assumption, sister (and kind of insensitive). Just because I neither have breasts nor a wife doesn’t mean that my son wasn’t breast fed. He was for the first 4-5 months for the most part (from the boob directly and via pumped milk both). That’s a story for another day though.
I did read the article and I guess I’m not getting the same thing out of it that you did. And I think you’re getting unnecessarily defensive about this. I’m a gay – it’s in my DNA to be pro-all-things-woman. I was raised by a single mother and I have 3 sisters. All of my closest friends are beautiful, strong women and 90% of them are hippie mamas, which I love about them. There will never be a person who’s more fiercely protective of the ladies than I am and if you knew me in real life you’d get that. So, this isn’t a situation where I’m being all small minded, anti-boob or anything else. I was joking earlier about being freaked out about the possibility of boob shots being this post. I’ve probably seen more boobies in my life than The Hef.
I think the best way to sum it up is by using a poster my old civics teacher had in his room. It said, “Your rights end where the next person’s begin”.
I have absolutely no issues with breast feeding or breast feeding in public. Like I said, I’ve been out with one of my best friends and she’s breast fed in the middle of a packed restaurant. Because of how she handled it (when we came in, she asked for a more private booth, when it was time to feed, she positioned herself differently and, though she rarely covers up, she’s very aware of keeping things from being exposed) I’ve never felt uncomfortable and I don’t think most people had any idea it was going on. Rather than make a statement by breast feeding, she made it a total non-issue. I’ve been out with my own sisters who have breast fed walking through Wal-Mart. It’s just not a major issue for me when it’s completely about feeding the tot.
But people have a right to not want to see it as much as you have a right to do it. Like I’ve said, it’s a balancing act and, whether you like it or not, you do have to be considerate of the fact that not everyone wants to see someone breast feeding. Because, even though to you it’s only feeding a baby, to others it might not be. To them it’s an exposed breast while they’re trying to eat dinner with their family. And, like I said in my original comment, that’s part of how puritanical the US still is. But pushing something on other people isn’t going to achieve your goal; it just creates more resistance.
I’m just saying that you can’t force your comfort level on others or fault them for their own tolerances. Can’t we all just get along?
What did I say that was offensive and what line did I cross? If anyone was offensive and crossing lines it was you when you said “talk to me when you have kids/learn to lactate”. Do you know my situation? Do men’s rights not matter because they cant have children? That was a really shitty thing to say especially by someone who was earlier on her high horse about being sensitive to others who’s situations you know nothing about. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. I have said it over and over and over again that I am 100% PRO BREAST FEEDING AND EVEN DOING SO IN PUBLIC. I am just not pro shoving over-exposed boobs in others faces. THATS IT.
Thanks for the article. I am going on 5 months BF. Today I got out of a faculty meeting at school as I have prioritized going home for the afternoon feeding (I am a teacher at a super understanding hippie school) , so that is actually one of the coolest things that BF has brought about so far. I might BF for years if I never have to go to any faculty meetings. Anyway the article is amazing and so right on. I think we have lost so much from not being around mothers and babies as our past generations were. That is probably why there are so many books, blogs etc about child rearing. At least we have MODG.
I absolutely read the article and dont see how it relates at all to the points that I and perhaps Ryan are trying to make. Do you even read our comments?
I have NO problem seeing my friends, my sister, my other family members breastfeed. They all seem to be able to keep it discrete in public (<- this being my point, IN PUBLIC) Not all of them used a hooter hider. Infact, only 2 of my friends did. The others had the nursing bras where they could be pulled down enough so the baby could latch. What is so wrong with that. And when I have babies, if I am able to even have them (so thanks for that remark) I will talk to them about tricks of the trade, not by ogling strangers feeding their babies in public.
This is about being out in public and perhaps having one ounce of consideration for others trying to enjoy their meal who wont appreciate a total strangers TITS staring back at them. So it has nothing to do with feeding a baby. I dont want to see your tits. I am not saying you have to hide behind a curtain, our cower in a bathroom or your car, but some women, and for the third time today I will repeat myself, SOME, NOT ALL women, show no consideration for others, and just lift their shirt up WAY HIGHER than it needs to be, and expose WAY more than is necessary. And let the boob just HANG even with no baby attached to it. Why is that necessary?
bottom line is that this is your issue. It’s not the issue of the person feeding their baby. You are the one uncomfortable with it, so you have to deal with it. I just left a breastfeeding group where a girl was in tears because she had to feed her baby and a woman came up to her and said “can’t you find a more private place to do that?” I’m sorry, but I don’t agree with either of you.
MODG, the level to which you are self absorbed and hypocritical is comical!
I’m trying to get pregnant with #2. I just know that if i had this boob hat lined up, i’d get pregnant ASAP. Boo-hay. (oh, and I “liked” the facebook page via my facebook page: Full Belly Sisters)
ummm, “boo-hay” = “boo-yah”
I don’t need a boobie hat… Not preggo nor are any of my friends at the moment. But I just want to say yay for breastfeeding and yay for breastfeeding in public. Your baby doesn’t need to starve because people will give you they “side-eye im gonna puke because you are feeding your kid” However…. Please don’t ever ever flop your nip out in the middle of church service so everyone can see. This happened in my teens and I am still traumatized. I saw not just a little but the whole boob. It was not pretty but I am pretty sure she wanted everyone to see her anyway. So yay for feeding your kid… boo for acting like a stripper in church.
I like’d her facebook page and DEFINITELY want to snag a boobiebeanie!!!
I just gotta say that I love reading your comments almost as much as the post. This is such an informative blog with the best fan base eva! I eat this shxt for dessert.
My votes are for Tia and Brianna. Just sayin’.
I would <3 a boobie beanie! my boob warmer needs a head warmer!
Man, I would really love the weird kind of attention this would get me!!
Soooooo, I only recently discovered your blog having my baby 11 weeks ago. Loving it so much/stalking I decided to go back and read everything from the beginning. I’m done now and I feel sad like when I finished the Twilight series. Like how am I going to pass the time while breast feeding? Keep the posts coming! You’re officially bookmarked and you made me feel less crazy for just how crazy I felt after the baby came. No one told me about the sads being a real thing! I thought they only happened to Brooke Shields!
I would use my FREE “boobie nipple” (that is what my 6yr old calls the nips…) beanie to cure world hunger.
And if that doesn’t work, I will use it to keep my chunky monkey’s big, bald head warm in the coming harsh, winter months
I totally want a boobie beanie!! It would look so cute on my boobie baby, almost 8 months! I too have rather large breasts 34 H!! And yes for a long time my boobs were larger than his head! I find it easiest to nurse side lying
I would love to put it on him anytime I go to a restaurant and see the look on peoples face while wearing the hat and *gasp* breastfeeding 
Now that’s a fucking nipple! Wonder how big they come. Thinking I could wear it to karate class next week.
Love the hat! Very cute! Id love one. I am a proud breast feeding momma of 3 beautiful healthy babies. I nursed all my kids to around 18 mo with out supplementing and working full time at nights. My newest breastfeeding baby is my first girl 5 mo old, and I openly nurse her any where any time (except in a restroom). I have been seen breastfeeding while helping my four year old across the monkey bars, breastfeeding at Bounce U while helping my 2 year old up the slide, at a wedding or a funeral! I have had old women come up at complemeant me on my choice (“that you just dont see these young girls nurse any more”) Mothers smile while they walk by and strike up a convo with their expierences. I have also had mothers move their kids away so not to contaminate them with my breast feeding ways or get embarressed and run away. I might not be saving the world but openly breastfeeding my babies is my small step of maiking it the “NORM” and buring 800 cal a day doing it! I’d love to flaunt a boobie beanie on my daughter these winter months so EVERYONE know what I am doing and wont hae to stare so long!
I’d love one of these hats. It would keep my 7 week old son’s head warm while I feed him in the bath tub.
They should give those away when you leave the hospital. I NEED one.
i would just LOVE this boob hat for 2 reasons.. i LOVE breastfeeding and i LOVE your blog- so much that i talk about it with my friends, coworkers, and husband and they would think i’m borderline crazy (which i can be) if i now start copying your style
thanks!
I just wanted to say that you look super cute!
Bwhahahaha I love the hat. I think I need one…or three
Sweet pappy Johnson but I want this hat! I’m from Oregon, and if I were still there it would be totally unnecessary since everyone is a super hippie and I’d have no one to embarass. Because obviously the main selling point of that hat is to make someone uncomfortable. But now, like Ginny, I live in the South and everyone is a prim ‘n proper bottle pusher. The kidling isn’t even due for another two months and despite making my breastfeeding intentions clear, all I get are questions about when I’m going to start him on a bottle. When I tell them he will only be drinking straight from the tap until I go back to work, I get the “You can plan all you want, but God has his own plan.” Apparently God is anti-boob.
If it helps even more, I’m Japanese. Yeah, trying being an Asian hippie cop who plans on breastfeeding and cloth diapering in the South. IT BLOWS THEIR MINDS.
“That’s when I realized that people need to get better about breastfeeding and karaoke”. True that sister!!
I’m from the South, where breastfeeding in public is just not done, so I NEED this boob hat to lead the charge with humor and grace… or just humor. Otherwise I’ll be forced to paint a giant nipple on the back of my 6 week-old’s naked head.
Line extension idea for the Boobie Beanie people….you know how knit bikinis were kinda popular for a while? IDEA: Bikini top made out of knit boobies.
Yep, I went there. I don’t know whether to be proud or horrified by this idea.
I’m totally breast feeding while reading this, and typing with one hand. I applaud your hippiness and am with you 100% on breastfeeding. I may not quite be the hippie that you are MODG, I tried the cloth diapers for awhile with Thing 1 and Thing 2, but with #3 that is currently latched on (to my left breast if you were wondering) it’s just another thing that I don’t have time for. But we’re talking about boobs here, and I just want to say that breastfeeding is totally conducive to my lazy style of parenting. Love the hat!
I don’t think I’m brave enough to pull off the boob hat with my 6 month old (or either of my cats – they would probably just stab me and tear it to shreds), but I just wanted to say I think it’s amazing and that is hands-down the best breastfeeding photo I have ever seen!
I’m a new reader and I’ve really enjoyed catching up on the old posts about your pregnancy and baby G. I’ve actually been eating soy & dairy free for the past few months for my little fart rocket and I was so intrigued by what you said about drinking lots of water, because I never drink enough and am probably always slightly dehydrated. So, the past few days I have been drinking as much water as I can stomach and crossing my fingers that I’ll be able to eat cheese again soon!! Thanks for keeping this awesome blog and being so real and honest about your experiences. It’s so helpful as a new mom to know other people are going through the same things.
Due with my first in about 5 weeks and would LOVE to plop this on the kid’s head whenever I have to nurse in public. Or in front of my father-in-law (same thing). Have duly “liked” her FB page as well.
I could totally use this hat. I’m due in February and it will be so cold that everyone’s nips will be hard. So cold, my kids will NEED a hat. So cold my kid will need a hat that will piss off my inlaws. Yes, the ones who think breasts used in their natural function are indeed pornographic and will clog the cleanliness of their dear sons’ minds. Piss them off even more? Wear this hat when the kid is over two (oh, the humanity!) and still getting boob milk from the tap.
What a great post. I certainly don’t need one of those hats anymore (my babies are 2 and 4 years old), but I do want to say something that I think is important for your readers to hear:
I breastfed my daughter for 17 months in public, whenever and wherever necessary, IN A MUSLIM COUNTRY (i.e. where women cover themselves from head to toe – we lived overseas) and got nothing but support from the general population. I did not use a cover (my baby wouldn’t want that over her head!) and always wore a nursing tank under my regular shirt – I looked just like MODG in the picture (minus the boob hat). What I’m trying to say is that you couldn’t see anything and I was just FEEDING MY BABY.
I love this post because I often hear women, even breastfeeding advocates, in the blogosphere talk about how they don’t nurse in public or are uncomfortable doing so. What a shame! Are you really either nursing in your car, in a bathroom, or never leaving your house for an entire year???? INSANE! I know I wouldn’t have survived that way.
I don’t always drink milk but when I do, I drink dos boobies!
I had a preemie in may (1lb 6oz… so much for the hippie natural birth I had planned) but I can’t wait to boob feed that little guy with one of these hats on!
I was not always on the boob parade but it is much cooler than I ever thought! Keep up the great posts MODG! Here’s to happy holes, hippie shit, and weird boob hats for babies. The only thing yhat could class up the look is if you were wearing one of those t-shirts painted to look like you were in a bikini
I WANT ONE because I’m a winner – duh. And frankly, I feel like my boobs are seriously as big as your kids head, it will actually be proportionate…sick I know. And if after my kid is born in January they grow even more I’m going to just freaking die…
And I liked her on fbook – feel free to check.
I would love to win a boob hat! Those are the best idea I’ve seen in a long time. So funny! Great way to “break the ice”. I am a new mom and I am trying to get more comfortable with breastfeeding in public and I think this would help.
I would love to have one of these hats!!! I think its hilarious when I’m NIP and someone starts talking to me then they realize I’m BF and get all awkward!! LOL This beanie would just make it 10 times funnier!! Nipples ROCK!
Is your cat wearing boob hat? Because that would be awesome.
I tote convinced my bff to BF in public for the first time today. GO NIPPLES!
Our Growing Garden
Ok, I totally don’t need the beanie hat, but I wanted to let you know that I pretty much peed myself at the picture of your cat.
sleep with one eye open tonight, my friend.
These are awesomely amazing. Do you think it would be weird if I start wearing these hats out while watching football games? I’m sure no drunk old skeezy men would start sucking my head, right?
Holy comments. Well I’m a rather large glass of wine in and thought I’d take a shot at getting this fantastic beanie for my little guy! Why I need it…. I’m the proud mama of a breastfeeding 8 week old boy and the wife of a marine. While my husband was here for his birth, he’s left for training several times since and is currently gone now. I have to give single moms tons of credit because this shit is hard. Also, we made a trip home last week. 13 hour drive with an infant. To keep myself occupied and sane, I read past modblog posts, almost the whole way. Your posts had my husband and I laughing hysterically the whole time.
I’d love this hat for my little guy, and as a bonus it may just make me feel a bit more comfortable about nursing in public. Also, I have ‘liked’ her facebook page
I have just read the breastfeeding in public dispute you posted on the TBC facebook page, and those other blogs you referred to. So far, while I’ve been out with my baby for a number of hours, we typically can nurse in the car between stores. When I first brought him home and my house was full of people all the time, I would nurse him openly. I told everyone, “I’m about to nurse, stick around, I don’t care if you don’t.” At first, the male family members would go away, but they’ve started to be cool because I’m cool. I can’t deal with the covering up blanket thing. I can sort of work it out, but I have to see my baby’s face when he’s eating. Part of it is because its still not super easy for us, and I can’t just throw a blanket over him and hope it goes ok. That’s another reason to let women do what they need to do, breastfeeding is not easy, as much as the unknowing, unsupportive public might think. Dealing with covering up adds another step to and already cumbersome activity.
They are amazing. But if I put it on the dog, my 9-mos-old son would probably try to suck the dog’s head. He loooooves the boob something fierce and is fairly indiscriminate about it. He once tried to gum the chest of an old man with saggy man boobs.
I tried formula feeding but it just didn’t work for me. All that stuff people say about it being healthier, easier, and more convenient just really didn’t apply to my situation. I guess I’m just too poor and lazy to buy fancy-pants expensive Similac and wash bottles constantly and lug them around and prepare them to juuust the right temperature to kill all the potentially dangerous microorganisms that sometimes get in there. How cool it is that some women have the time and patience to go through all of that for their babies. I just didn’t have it in me. It really bugs me too how those formula ads and smug women like to rub it in my face that their babies sleep soooooo well and how they’re never worried about them “getting enough” and that anyone can feed them and no one gets icked out and they can go out and do whatever the hell they want. Jeez ladies, ENOUGH already.
I mean, the kid has to suck on my tit. Evolution really missed the mark here. I feel guilty enough that I have to give my baby this old fashioned breast milk and it seems like you guys and all the celebs can afford high-end, processed cow breast milk with technologically advanced synthetic vitamins and minerals like DHA from algae and other rad stuff like hydrolyzed vegetable protein (aka MSG aka the stuff that makes Chinese food taste deeeelicious) and corn syrup solids out of a completely inoffensive fake boob-like plastic bottle that’s “closer to nature”!!! I love being close to nature without actually being there, kind of like looking at paintings of trees.
I need that hat because I need all the support I can get. My choice is not a popular one, despite what the scientists and World Health Organization have to say… who are they and WTF do they know anyway? Seriously, how did the human race make it this far without processed cow breast milk artificial baby milk supplements?! Ladies, If you’re planning to formula feed, at least have a backup plan because it’s really hard and messy and probably not going to work out for you like it didn’t work out for me. Seriously, you might as well just give up now.
If I’m gonna be stuck with a baby strapped to my chest, he might as well have a cool hat.
For those of you with no sense of humor, obviously I’m joking. Seriously, my heart goes out to anyone who wanted to breastfeed but couldn’t for a legit reason or gave up due to bad information, aggressive marketing of artificial baby milk substitutes, and a lack of of confidence in their bodies that is SO NOT HELPED by people who are uncomfortable with a breast being used to, gasp, feed a child. And don’t get me started on our shitty maternity leave and how that can kill a breastfeeding relationship by bringing us back to work right when some of us are just getting the hang of it. I don’t believe you messed up or failed in any way, but I do believe that a system we’re supposed to trust failed you miserably. If you bottle fed by choice and feel that your decision was fully informed, that’s cool too and I’m definitely not bashing anyone here. Formula is not poison and I’m sure your baby is fine.
Anytime there’s a group of people who feel marginalized by doing something totally normal there’s going to be backlash. Some of it’s quiet, like support groups, and some of it is a little more “in your face” like letting it all hang out and wearing (awesome) nipple hats just to get a rise out of people.
I do my best to be discreet while nursing my one year old because they are boobs after all, and even dudes are required to wear shirts in most situations. But I refuse to cover him up with a dumbass tent because that is just not comfortable for him and the few times we did try that he yanked the cover off so quickly everyone got a nip shot anyway. And I 100% refuse to do something unnatural and nutritionally substandard like bottle feed formula (or even bother with pumping milk), because my boob might make someone uncomfortable. He has a right to get out of the house now and then as anyone else (and Lawd knows I have to) and he also has a right to eat what he’s supposed to eat and not an inferior substitute.
What if grownups were required to only drink a can of Ensure instead of eat food any time they went in public? (Ok, I am pretty grossed out by that double bacon cheeseburger you’re shoving in your fat face but whatevs.) And feed him in a bathroom? Do I even have to say how disgusting and dehumanizing that is? I also nurse discreetly while in public to prove to others that it doesn’t have to be the uncomfortable exhibitionist boob-for-all that formula marketing and uninformed people try to convince new moms that it is.
To all of you pregnant ladies planning to breastfeed, arm yourselves with all the information and education you can get your hands on. Don’t trust any breastfeeding advice that formula companies provide. Remember, they have a vested interest in you NOT being successful at nursing. Don’t trust breastfeeding websiyes that run formula ads. Doctors mean well but for the most part lack formal training in the mechanics of lactation and with breastfeeding rates being as low as they are, they lack a lot of actual experience with it as well. On top of that, doctors are also being aggressively marketed to and often get kickbacks from promoting formula. Kellymom.com has some great evidence based articles and so does Beast for Babes. Go to a La Leche League meeting, they have them everywhere. And OF COURSE read MODG, for her hilariously brilliant and realistic take on the more glamourous aspects of the boobie-feeder lifestyle (wink wink, nudge nudge).
Trust your boobs, trust the billions of babies throughout human history who did just fine with boob milk and nothing else and the women who fed them without questioning their capabilities. Your body is not broken. There are few nursing problems that can’t be solved by more nursing, “low supply” being one of them. The more the baby sucks, the more your boobies make. Do it anytime, anywhere, and don’t even bother with a pacifier because that’s what boobs are for. It might be weird or painful at first, but it does get better. It even gets fun. Now send me the GD hat, MODG.
*standing ovation for Rachel C*
another *standing ovation for Rachel C*
Found this on Pinterest and it made my day! I would totally love to win one, but I am one of the .000000001% of the population that DOES NOT have a Facebook account. If I did, I would like her page!
I want to win so my daughter can sport the cap during my sister’s rehearsal dinner. Because milk is what’s for dinner! (ok, also for awesome drama…gotta love it)
I like the bring back boobie beanies page on Facebook.
NIPPULAR IS MY NEW WORD. CAPS NECESSARY. Hilarious!
P.S. I’m not the only Tia who has ever commented here before…but I did totally “like” the FB page.
I’m totally pro-BF and I am happy to have nursed my son, but I think this hat is so obnoxious.
I don’t have a baby yet nor am I expecting one at the moment. I am however, one of “those” people who is COMPLETELY weirded out by breast feeding. It has nothing to do with a fear of nipples or boobs. I’m am actually a big fan of both. There is just something about breast feeding that seems so unnatural to me. It’s backwards I know. I’m not saying I won’t try it when I have a baby (because I will) but from where I’m sitting now I can honestly say I am NOT looking forward to it. There is something unsettling about knowing that the dirty things my husband does with my boobs now will someday be my childs source of nutrition. It’s just not right. Now slap a boobiebeanie on the baby heads and it suddenly becomes amusing. I’ll take 2 please
I totally need that hat because there are lots of upcoming holiday get togethers that just beg for a boob hat.. HaHAHAHAH my hubby’s family REALLY needs to see me nursing my 14 month old sporting that hat.
Holy mother of everything that is right in this world! I f-ing love your blog. Like, seriously. I got here (to this post) via a board I follow in Pinterest and immediately sent a link to my sis (currently BFing her 1st child) on Facebook. This is totally what I will henceforth recommend to every BFing mother in my life for dealing with the anti-BFing trolls. I have been through about 7 of your posts now and they are all f-ing fabulous. Thank you for being awesome and sharing that awesome with the rest of us.