Hello old friends,
It’s been a spell hasn’t it? In the time where you and I have sorely missed each other, I have become more pregnant than ever before, we have survived a hurricane, had our first successful child halloween, and celebrated B’s birthday and I’ve done these things without committing bodily harm to any individuals. This is an accomplishment friends. Through this post I’ll show you some pictures of things you’ve missed.
See, with G’s pregnancy I got to 38 weeks and my water was all, PARTY and broke. This spiraled into terrible non existent labor and a c-section. When I passed that point in this pregnancy, I felt so happy I could pee (non uterus water, just actual pee). However, I didn’t realize how much harder it is to be pregnant at 39+weeks. It’s no joke. It feels like my vagina is holding in a Chris Christie with a few strings and scotch tape.
And yes, we survived a hurricane. I literally thought I would 1) go into labor and have to have this baby by candlelight on the bathroom floor. And I wouldn’t even be able to tell someone to get a pot of boiling water because we wouldn’t have power. Not that I know what that’s for or anything. But even though I cried a little every time the wind blew, we made it with down power for a few hours and no damage. Other than to B’s ego. WHO DOESN’T GET SPARE BATTERIES FOR THE FLASHLIGHTS? B thinks hurricanes aren’t real. He told me he was most worried about having to get more groceries. You know, more than worried about our lives.
Now here I sit, hour to hour, day to day waiting for something. Anything to happen. I have had minimal braxton hicks. I stare at the toilet water every time I visit it for what everyone tells me should be a mucus plug. Sickness. No plugs or mucus. Just pee. So much pee. Our toilet paper costs have doubled. And I deal with the balance of doing stuff to make the baby come versus not doing too much to break my water like it did the first time. Because we are looking at 3 scenarios people…from best to worst case:
1) I go into labor on my own, with normal contractions and have the baby just like every other idiot on I Didn’t Know I was Pregnant. Except probably not in the toilet. But I’d take it if I had to.
2) I don’t go into labor on my own in time (41 weeks is my cut off for a VBAC) but I have dialated some on my own and get induced. I at least get a shot then at a vaginal birth.
3) I don’t go into labor on time, I don’t dialate at all and have to have a C-section. This would kill me.
So this week we’ll probably start doing some “stuff”. Sweeping membranes. Sounds nice doesn’t it? It’s not. It’s when they give your cervix a twist and a punch to get things going. I asked my midwife about all the other things. Like sex to get the baby out. She said that’s something that men made up to have sex. And that is why I love her. But really nothing is proven with the pineapple or the extra walking or the spicy foods or the playing Nickelback on repeat to your stomach (I’d climb out of a vagina too to escape that). So we sort of wait. And hope.
In the mean time I promised you a few things. First, the winner of the contest from last post: Winner you have a few days to contact me. If I go into labor, you’re on your own sister so make it fast….
The randomizer chose the winner and the winner is:
Rae Rae October 25, 2012 at 8:50 pm
Owen is obsessed with garbage cans, rubber bands, and string cheese wrappers. Who needs toys?
Email me at email@example.com
And of course the Big Boy Room. See, I’ve been waiting for a sunny day to take some nice pictures. I know you’re like, F that MODG just show us the goods. But my designer worked so hard, I want the best possible pictures I can. And of course as I’m waiting for this sunny day, we get a hurricane and 9 straight days of death clouds. Even our sunny days are like sick and disgusting cloudy. So if I don’t get sun tomorrow, I’ll show you the pictures and be done with it.
So check tomorrow.
K. Love you. Please keep my vagina in your thoughts.
Shout out to fire safety. Love, G.